Love Comes on the Wings of Death
by Uruwashii Inochi
Summary: Quatre and Heero are constantly seperated by Heero's job and Quatre worries for Heero's health as it deteriorates. Then one night Quatre gets a chillingly familiar business card. Sequel to Desert Love.
1. Ch 1 Uncertainnty

I do not own anything Gundam wing. The only thing I own is Janice.

Ch. 1 Uncertainty

Quatre sat alone at the magnificent dinning room table in his empty house. His hands rested on the arms of his chair as he stared down at his untouched meal. The special meal that he had cooked to celebrate Heero's return from his most recent mission, but dinner had once again been canceled when Heero had received orders from Preventers for another mission. He had been gone over a month the last time and had barely walked in the front door that evening when the phone rang telling him to report to head quarters immediately.

There had been no apology from Heero as he turned on his heel and strode out. What bothered him was there was no hello, good bye, I missed you or be back soon, nothing, just cold silence and a blank face. In the past year that they had been together he had seen Heero maybe four days in all that time. When they were together, things were great, Heero became the loving boyfriend that visited him at work when he was having a particularly hard day; comforted him when he had nightmares from the psycho that nearly killed him last year. He would even take care of him when he had, had too much to drink the night before after partying with the rest of the ex-pilots.

Now, now everything was different. When Heero had returned to work, after they had mandated that he take a two week vacation, his work load seemed to double, then triple until there was no more time for a them. Oh, they were still together, Quatre knew that, but the distance being forced between them was creating a strain on their relationship.

He sighed and pushed his chair back and left the table, the food having gone cold hours earlier. Zeus' padded paws made a soft pitter patter sound as he followed Quatre throughout the house, telling Quatre the he was just as lonely. Living in such a large house with no company was depressing and what made it worse was that Heero had moved in with him, though he still had his apartment.

His thoughts drifted back to the conversation they'd had a month ago. Heero had stumbled in the front door the night before, bruised, dirty and dripping blood every where. He had been relieved when he found that none of it was Heero's. Sleep deprived and exhausted, Heero could barely make up the stairs and into the shower.

There was so much he had wanted to say but decided to wait until morning since Heero had showered and passed out on the bed naked and still wet from his shower. Drying him off as best he could and pulling the blankets up, he had settled down next to him and drifted off into an uneasy sleep.

The following morning had not been much better than the night before. He was beginning to think that Heero was really pushing his limits with all the missions. Heero had lost a considerable amount of weight after the past few and he wasn't doing anything to gain it back. His tanned skin had taken on a pallor the screamed malnutrition. The confrontation he had with Heero about it hadn't gone well.

Quatre had asked him how long he would be back. When Heero had responded with three day, he pleaded with him to request time off, explaining that it wasn't healthy for him to be put under such stressful situations and physical demands. Things were worse now than they had been during the wars. Heero had shrugged him off saying that it was his job and he wasn't going to request 'time off', he didn't need it. Angry, Quatre had lashed out him screaming something to the effect that they weren't in a war and Heero couldn't deal with the fact that they no longer needed him as a soldier. That night Heero had left with another set of orders from Lady Une, they mission he had just returned from.

There was a soft mew next to him and he looked down at Zeus who giving as confused look, as if to ask why they had stopped in the middle of the stairs when he could be on the bed. Quatre smiled, picked him up and carried him up the stairs and into the bedroom where he set him down on the bed. Zeus gratefully curled up into ball in the middle of the bed and started purring looking very much like he did when Heero had first held him.

He pulled off his shirt and tie, tossing them to the floor at the foot of the bed before he started running the water for his shower. There hadn't been time for him to change or shower when he had first got home. As soon as he walked in the door, he had taken off his jacket and set to work on the dinner he was preparing for Heero.

"Ha!" he said out loud to himself; a beautiful dinner that was now sitting down stair going to waste. He supposed he could put it all in the fridge and eat it another day, but what would be the point when he would have to eat it alone.

Undressing the rest of the way, he stepped into the steaming hot shower, letting all the tension disappear as the water ran over him. He braced his hands on the wall letting the water hit his back and tried to remember the last time he had showered with Heero standing behind him. The thought brought a smile to his lips and bitter tears to his eyes as he turned around to wash. He could not really remember the last time they had showered together; in fact, he could not remember the last time they had done anything intimate at all. He quickly finished washing, rinsed his hair trying to forget his previous thoughts.

Back in the bedroom, he sought out his favorite pair of black pants, the pair that Heero had bought for him while he was in the hospital the year before. They were pretty much the only thing he had from Heero, besides Zeus, but he belonged to both of them. Finally locating his pants, under the bed where Zeus had playfully hid them, he slipped them on. It was then that he noticed the cat dancing around on the bed excitedly, looking at the clock he realized that he hadn't fed Zeus yet and it was now eleven at night.

"Come on." Quatre said to the cat as he motioned for him to follow.

He almost fell down the stairs as Zeus rushed by in his frenzy to eat. Rounding the bottom of the stairs he remembered that dinner was still sitting on the table, cold and untouched. Bitterly, he cleared the table, putting the meal in the fridge; after spending so much time on it, he was not going to let it go to waste, even if he had to eat it alone. Pouring some milk for Zeus he started to make his way upstairs when he remembered that Heero had brought the mail in with him, it was still sitting on the entry table. Grabbing the mail from the table he sorted through the junk mail so it could be discarded at a later time. He had not gotten very far when the door bell rang. Answering it he found a mail carrier holding out a letter from Duo. He accepted it and the man went on his way and for a moment he wondered why a mail carrier was out so late. He turned back to the mail in his hand. There was not much, a few bills, some things from work, a letter from Duo and an envelope that had no return address just his name printed across the front. It was probably another invite to one of Relena's parties. He could look at that later, right now he was more interested in why Duo was writing him when he could just call.

Quatre put the bills in his study, to be paid at a later date, tossing out the junk mail and took the rest up stairs to the bedroom. Zeus feet padded softly behind him as he entered the room, he waited patiently for the cat to enter before shutting the door for the night. He buried himself deep into the covers while Zeus took up his spot at the foot of the bed. Opening the letter he was happy to see Duo's handwriting scrawled across the paper.

_Quatre,_

_You are probably wondering why I'm writing you when I could just call. I haven't been able to reach you at the office or home and I hate answering machines. If it isn't human or Deathscythe, I don't want to talk to it._

Quatre stopped to laugh at the irony in the last sentence, gundams where, after all, nothing but a machine. Then again, none of the pilots had ever thought of them as such, well, except maybe Heero. They had been their companions, comrades and friends, even if they were just made of gundanium. When it came time that they were no longer needed, they had all lost a little part of themselves along with the gundams. Quatre continued on knowing that Duo only wrote when it was important.

_By now you are probably wondering what my point is for writing this letter since I never write without good reason so I'll get right to the point. I'm worried about Heero. I was called into Preventers today and saw Heero on his way out. I don't think I've ever seen him look so bad. I stopped to talk to him but he said that he was on his was home to see you. Not wanting to hold him up I went on my way to get instruction for a case that they "desperately" need my talents for. When I was leaving Heero was on his way back in saying that Lady Une had called him in for another mission._

_I think he's working way too hard and needs to take a break, but of course you've already told him that I'm sure. Something has to be done about this. There's no way that Une and WuFei haven't noticed this if Trowa and I already have. What I don't understand is why he is pushing himself this hard. He never does anything this extreme without having very good reasons to back it up._

_If you have a plan on this let us know. Trowa and I would be more than happy to drag him home and strap his ass to the bed!_

There was a huge smiley face after that sentence that made Quatre smile; Duo's sense of humor did that to him.

_Trowa and I both agree, if you're lonely in that enormous thing you call a house, you're more than welcome to come to ours. In fact, please do, it would be nice to talk to someone who has a sense of humor._

There was a bunch of scribbles at this point.

_Maybe I shouldn't have said that, Trowa just smacked me in the arm for that comment. I think I'll have a bruise by morning._

Another smiley.

_Anyway, take care and we hope to see you soon!_

_The God of Death_

_Hahaha ok, not any more._

_Duo_

Quatre folded up the letter and put it back in the envelope. So Trowa and Duo had noticed Heero drastic change as well. The were right, something had to been done immediately about Heero. First thing in the morning he would go to Preventers and talk to Lady Une about it. Setting Duo's letter down he grabbed the invitation wondering what event they were celebrating this time. Inside he found that there was no invite, just a small piece of paper that turned out to be a business card. Turning it over, to his horror he discovered it was one of his business cards with the initials MD.

(o)(o)(o)

Well chapter one is now out on the sequel to Desert Love. Hope you all enjoy this one as much as the first story. Let me know what you think. If the intro to this sounds a little familiar, I wrote something similar in another story where Heero stood Duo up for dinner in Confessions from the Perfect Soldier.


	2. Ch 2 A New Partner

Ch. 2 A New Partner

"Where the hell is Heero?" Quatre demanded outraged, as he stood in Lady Une's office.

Une studied the angry blonde for a moment not really sure why he was so livid with her.

"He should be at home." She responded coolly, trying to diffuse the situation.

Quatre let out a short angry laugh. He couldn't believe what he was hearing and he did not have the patients to play games with her today. Sleep had not found him at all last night as he had tried to figure out how the man could have possibly survived.

"I know you sent him on another mission Une. You called the house last night telling him to report for his next assignment. Duo even saw him on his way out and Heero had told him that you were assigning him on another mission."

Now Lady Une was thoroughly confused and she speculated that Quatre might be on something.

"Quatre, I didn't send him on another mission." Une stated as she sat behind her desk.

"If it's a classified case I don't care, I need to know where he is!" He began pacing her office in an attempt to relieve some of his stress.

"Honestly Quatre, I didn't send him on another mission. In fact I threatened to fire him if he didn't take some time off."

Quatre stopped his pacing immediately to stare at her.

"If he's not on a mission, then where is he?" He collapsed into one of her office chairs resting his head on its back, eyes closed. "It's imperative that I find him Une."

"Janice, can you come in here?" Lady Une paged Heero's secretary. "I'll get to the bottom of this."

The office door opened as Janice entered, her hazel eyes sparking and long brown hair bouncing behind her.

"Yes, Lady Une, what can I do for you?" Her voice was cheery as it always was. She flashed Quatre a smile in greeting.

"Janice, did Heero come back to the office last night?"

"Yes, he said he had left some important paperwork behind and needed to retrieve it."

"Did he say where we was going?" Une inquired, hoping to find some information on Heero's whereabouts.

"No, but I assumed he was going home since you had ordered him to take leave or be terminated. He was in a frightful mood when he left." A worried look dominated her pretty features. "Why, is something wrong? Did something happen to him?" She had grown attached to Heero even with all his difficult personality. She would hate to have to work for someone else.

"No, everything is fine. Thank you."

With that Janice was dismissed to return to her work.

"I assure you that I'll look into this matter thoroughly and inform you if we find anything."

"Please Une; don't treat me like I'm a client or something. There is another reason why I'm here."

Lady Une leaned back, resting her elbows on her chair as she knit her fingers together. She watched as Quatre reached into his pocket for something and after finding it slid it across the desk to her. Une picked it up for a closer look, if there was surprise she didn't show it.

"I received that in the mail last night."

"This man died a year ago by Heero's hand. How can you have this?" She handed it back to him.

"I don't know, but either he's back or he has an apprentice." A chill ran up his spine as he remembered the last time he'd met one of the guy's apprentices. "That's why it's so important that I find Heero."

"Seeing that he's taken off and no one knows where he is, we'll just have to work this as is. I'll put an agent on it right away." She reached over towards her intercom.

"No." Quatre stopped her. "I would rather work this case on my own."

"Quatre, you're not a Preventer, I can't let you do that."

"Either way, I'm doing it. Heero and I did it last time; I can do it this time."

"Heero isn't here to help you this time so I'm going to assign someone."

Knowing that he wasn't going to get around it he let her page someone in when he had a brilliant idea.

"I would like to request someone, if you don't mind." He straightened in his chair.

"Okay, you know more about this case than I do, so who do you recommend?" She was a little curious to see who he would pair himself with.

His lips curved into a smile. "Janice."

(o)(o)(o)

"Mr. Winner, if you don't mind me asking but why did you choose to partner up with me?" Janice asked pleasantly as headed out towards his car.

"The only person that knows more about Heero than me is you." He glanced in her direction as he pulled out his cell phone to call Duo. "You want to be a Preventer, so here's your chance to prove yourself."

"Alright."

"That and you don't have any experience so you won't argue with me like the more seasoned agents do." He smiled at her as dialed Duo's number and waited for him to pick up.

"Hey Duo, its Quatre. You got room for two more? No, Heero's not with me, I'll explain when I get there. Alright, see you then." Quatre hung up as he pulled the keys from his pocket and unlocked the car and then they were leaving the Preventers parking lot.

"Can we stop by my place then? I'm going to assume that we'll be gone for a while and I'd rather not wear my work clothes."

"Sure, I actually have to stop by my house too and Duo won't be home for another hour yet, we have plenty of time to kill."

"My apartment is just around the corner."

She directed him to a nice looking apartment complex with a well tended lawn.

"You can come up if you like."

Not really wanting to sit in the car and in a desperate need to occupy himself, he agreed.

"Make yourself comfortable, I'll only be a second." She said as they crossed the threshold.

He watched as she disappeared into the bedroom.

Hers was a small one bedroom apartment, but comfortable and well furnished. It had a small table with two chairs in the kitchen and a nice wrap around couch against the far wall with two end tables and a coffee table in the center of the room. A very expensive looking sound system was set up in the entertainment center along with a TV, game systems and a ton of movies and games.

There was something about it that brought comfort to him, a warm feeling. It was probably because this was a home that was lived in and appreciated, not just some place to drop by for a day or two and be off. Janice emerged from the bedroom with a small duffle bag and had changed out of her work clothes. She now wore tight fitting blue jeans with a black tank top and her hair was in two French braids that were almost as long as Duo's.

"I just have to leave a note and we'll be off."

Quatre nodded from his spot in front of the door, that he had never moved from, while Janice scribbled a quick note.

"Alright, let's get out of here."

Leading the way out of the apartment, he stopped to allow her time to lock the door, before continuing down to the car. There next stop was his house and it didn't take him long to get there. He was greeted by an overtly enthusiastic cat as Zeus jumped up and down on his leg as if he were a dog. He bent down to pet him affectionately.

"This would be Zeus." He said happily as he made his way towards the stairs. "Make yourself at home, but I warn you, he's attention crazed."

Her light laughter followed him up the stairs as she picked up the cat. He wouldn't need to change since he had never gone to work, kakis and a white shirt, he had wanted to be comfortable after the night he'd had. Tossing some clothes and toiletries into his own duffle bag, he made a quick phone call to tell his sister he would be on vacation, before making his way back down stairs to see Zeus practically mauling Janice for attention, which she gladly returned.

"I warned you." He said smiling as he collected the cat's dishes and some food from the kitchen. "Would you mind brining the cat?" He asked opening the door. "He's coming with us."

"Sure." By now Zeus was content to lay in her arms knowing that she would rub on him.

After throwing his things in the trunk of the car he grabbed the mail and tucked it in between the seats when one of the envelopes caught his eye. It was had no address just like the last one, with only his name printed on it. Opening it, he found another business card with the initials HY. They could only mean one thing.

(o)(o)(o)

Well, there's chapter two for everyone. Please R&R so I know if I should continue with this or not.


	3. Ch 3 Zeus Attacks

Ch. 3 Zeus Attacks

They drove in awkward silence, Janice unsure of what to say. She had heard about the case Quatre and Heero had worked on the year before, the case that almost cost them both their lives. Now, Heero was next on the list. Glancing over at Quatre, she could see the worry on his face, like her, he was probably wondering if Heero could physically deal with being captured, if he was in fact captured. Janice put her hand on Quatre's and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"We'll find him Quatre. Heero will fight back, it's in his nature."

He gave her a pleasant smile. "I know we will." He said it more to reassure her confidence in him, in them, than for himself.

If Heero was next and had already been captured, he would not last long and they both knew that. He tried not to think about it as they pulled into the driveway of a white, two story slightly Victorian looking house. Duo stood on the porch waving frantically at them as they pulled up. He wasted no time as he bounded down the steps and over to the car so that he could crush Quatre in a hug, not that he minded. They hadn't seen each other in months so it wasn't surprising that they were ecstatic to see one another.

"Hey Trowa!" Quatre yelled from the trunk of the car, knowing that Trowa was standing on the porch, waiting.

Janice didn't say anything as she stepped out of the car and retrieved her things. It wasn't her place to interrupt when it was obvious that the former gundam pilots didn't see much of each other. She tossed the duffle bag over her shoulder and silently followed Quatre and Duo into the house, where Zeus promptly wiggled his way out of her arms.

"Quatre, you sly dog." Duo said as they entered the living room. "Heero is gone and you find yourself a girl friend." He jokingly jabbed Quatre in the ribs with his elbow.

Janice laughed with Quatre before responding. "Cute as Quatre is, it would never work between us."

"Why not?" Duo inquired curiously. "He has everything a woman could ever want. He's cute, muscular, has zillions of dollars and nothing to do with it."

"True as that maybe, I already have a girl friend. I'm not interested in guys, at least not at the moment." She gave him a wink.

"Well then, you'll fit right in." A big, Cheshire cat like grin spread over his face.

She smiled back; the braided American was everything she had been told he was.

"Ahh!" Duo jokingly cried as Zeus jumped up and down on his back legs swatting at the end of Duo's braid. "You brought the fur ball." With a flick of his head, the braid was laying over his shoulder and out of harms way. "Be careful about your hair, he chewed on the end of mine the last time he was here." Duo said to Janice, noticing her long hair.

Quatre laughed. "Poor Duo was so upset when we had to cut two inches of his gorgeous locks."

"Hey, my hair has never been cut and it's all grown back, thank you very much." Duo frowned in a mock pout.

"Ah, I totally forgot." Quatre said mildly alarmed. "This is Janice, Heero's secretary. Janice this is…."

She cut him off. "Loud, annoying, outgoing and obnoxious at times, you would be Duo." She said shaking his hand. "Tall, handsome and silent, you could only be Trowa."

"Well, she's got us pegged." Duo laughed. "Heero must have talked about us because he's the only one that says I'm annoying."

"Duo, we all say that." Trowa said taking a seat on the couch, Duo taking the spot next to him, his braid hanging lazily over the back of the couch.

"And you're the one that's stuck with me." He teased.

"Hn."

Quatre shook his head as he and Janice took the seats across from them. Some things just never changed. He watched in silence as Zeus padded quietly behind the couch seeking out his prey.

"Getting down to business, what's going on?" Duo asked before he screamed as his head suddenly snapped back. Reaching around and pulling his braid up over the couch, they found Zeus with his claws imbedded into the pleats of his hair and chewing on the hair tie that held it all together. "Darn cat." Duo grumbled as Trowa pried the cat off the braid and put him in his lap for some affection. It didn't take long for Zeus to fall asleep.

Quatre knew Dou wouldn't wait long to ask that, his curiosity always got the better of him. He gave them all a quick over view about what had happened the year before and the current situation. They all looked at the business cards agreeing that Heero was next or was already caught; no one wanted to consider the third option. Duo had his own mission so he was not sure how much of a help he could be and Trowa was busy with his own things but offered to help when he could.

"So why did Une assign Janice to the case? I thought she would have put WuFei on it or something."

"I requested her. Who sees Heero more than I do? It was the only logical thing to do."

"So where do you plan to start?" Trowa had asked the question trying to think about the case at hand.

"I'm not really sure where to start. The last case had clues telling us where to go. This one is different; it's only telling me that he's back and after Heero or possibly me, since I had taken Heero's place last time."

"Think it could be a trap?" Duo asked.

"When isn't it?" Quatre let out a sigh and fell back in his chair, closing his eyes to think about the situation. Where to start was a good question indeed.

"Well," he slapped the tops of his knees, "I don't know about you guys, but I'm hungry."

Quatre laughed and opened his eyes.

"Duo, you're always hungry and you're a horrible cook." Quatre joked, the despondent look on his face disappearing instantly.

"It just so happens that I'm a great cook." Janice piped up. "Or at least, that's what I've been told."

There was a slight flush to her cheeks and Quatre wondered if it was from embarrassment.

"Why don't you two cook and we'll move your things into your room." Trowa said setting the cat on the floor and removing himself from the couch to pick up Janice's bag.

Quatre picked up his own bag and headed up the stairs with Trowa.

"Well," Duo looked at her expectantly, "let's get things started." He jumped up and grabbing her by the wrists, pulled her out of her chair and into the kitchen.

(o)(o)(o)

Quatre followed Trowa upstairs and immediately went into the room he always stayed in when he had visited in the past. Trowa put Janice's things in the room next to his, Duo's old room in fact. He wondered momentarily if it had been cleaned, but if Trowa was putting her up in it, then the room was most definitely clean. After tossing his bag in a chair and shutting the door, he threw himself face down onto the bed, burying his face into the pillow. He resisted the almost overwhelming urge to scream into the pillow.

Like things were already complicated enough before. They had gotten together after some very unusual circumstances and had some how made it through. Then things when from good to bad quickly as things often do, and not only did they never see each other, but it was like their relationship did not exists. On top of all that, yet another psycho was on the loose and no one knew where the hell Heero was.

"Heero." He whispered it softly into the pillow as he felt the dampness from his eyes seep into it. "Where are you?" His shoulders began to shake slightly as he sobbed in the darkness of his room.

He did not want to think about any of it, he just wanted things to back to the way they had been when they had been happy, but even that seemed as though it never happened. Quatre gripped the pillow tighter before releasing it and rolling onto his back, wiping the tears from his face. They would find Heero and when they did, he would thoroughly beat him for being so reckless.

(o)(o)(o)

Sorry it took so long to get this out. Been distracted for the past few days. Will be starting the next on soon. Let me know what you think. Thanks for all the reviews.


	4. Ch 4 Cooking and Egos

Ch. 4 Cooking and Egos

A few hours later Quatre woke to a soft rapping on his door.

"Dinners ready." Trowa's voice came from beyond the door.

"Oh, alright." He answered drowsily.

Sitting up be blinked away the remaining sleep that still blurred his vision. When had he fallen asleep? He could not even remember going to sleep. The last think he remembered was bringing his things up to the room. Everything came back in a rush and he remembered the real reason he had gone up to his room. Things were such a mess at the moment and he did not even know where to begin. First, he would start with dinner; he was starving and wondered what Duo could have possibly talked Janice into cook. Poor girl, she really had no clue how bad Duo really was. If it were possible, Dou could burn water.

With a heavy sigh, he climbed out of bed and headed down to dinning room. Trowa was already sitting at the table in his usual spot so Quatre sat down across from him and stretched. While the table had already been set, there was no food on it.

"I thought dinner was ready." He said looking towards the kitchen door.

"It is. Duo is very proud of his 'master piece'." Trowa replied as he leaned back in his chair, arms crossed firmly over his chest.

The thought that Duo had created another one of his 'master pieces' made him nervous. Last time he had created one, they had all gotten food poisoning. With any luck, Janice had stopped Duo from making another disaster. Just then the kitchen door swung open with Duo and Janice carrying two dishes. After setting the dishes on the table they took their seats, Janice next to Quatre and Duo, always by Trowa.

"Smells delicious." Quatre commented as the aromas started to fill the air. He was still a little wary of eating it and by the look on Trowa's face; he was having the same problem.

Janice leaned over and whispered into Quatre's ear.

"Don't worry, I did all the work, Duo just mixed what ever I handed him." She sent him a sly wink as she started to fill her plate with food.

"What is it?" Trowa asked, still skeptical about eating it, but decided that it was alright since Quatre was smiling while he filled his own plate with food.

"Mmmm." Janice said trying to finish the food she had just put into her mouth. "It's Chicken Cacciatore with noodles. It's a very simple recipe."

"It's good." Trowa commented sounding almost shocked.

"I cooked it," Duo said, then added as an after thought, "with a little help from Janice."

"I see." Trowa smiled inwardly, he had seen the wink Janice had given Quatre. It had told him everything he needed to know.

The rest of the meal was eaten in silence and when the dishes had been cleared they all settled down in the living room. Trowa and Duo curled up on the couch reading the same book while Janice sat on the floor working on the laptop that Duo had lent her. Mean while, Quatre sat in a chair staring rather blankly at the wall. All he could think about was the problem at hand, how to find Heero and the killer.

"If you keep thinking like that, you're going to drive us all nuts." Trowa said.

"Hm." Quatre came out of his daze to find that Trowa, Duo and Janice were looking at him. "I can't help it." He folded his hands behind his head and looked up at the ceiling. "I don't have any leads to go on so I don't know where to start."

"I have a suggestion to that." Janice said from the floor as she returned to her work.

Quatre looked down at her as she continued.

"Heero's been spending a lot of time on 'extra' things at work. Normally he hands me all the files he's worked on for the day. Lately, he's been doing a lot of work on something I'm not supposed to know about."

"How do you know that?" Duo asked curiously.

"Like all good secretaries, I know everything about my employer." She smiled up at them, mischief in her eyes. "And I peeked at his laptop one day when he went out to lunch. He had forgotten to close out of his files and lock it before he left. So when I went in there to retrieve a case that Lady Une wanted, I saw what he was working on."

"Curiosity got the better of you." Trowa said evenly from the couch as he continued reading his book.

"Of course. He's was researching that building you were at last year."

"Medical Research and Development?" Quatre questioned now leaning over the arm of the chair.

"Yeah. I'm not sure why and I couldn't stay long without someone noticed, but I bet if we hack into his computer we could find out more."

At the mention of that Quatre's enthusiastic face fell as he rested his head on top of his hands.

"You talk as if cracking Heero's code were easy."

"Well, not for us, but Dou is just as good as Heero, right?" She looked intently at Duo waiting to hear his answer.

"Whoa, back the train up. You want me to hack Heero's computer? The last time I tried that it was disastrous." Duo said, pulling himself out of his comfortable spot in the crook of Trowa's arm.

"Dou, you're the only one that stands the chance of cracking it." Janice said. A little ego stroking never hurts. "Aren't you the best?"

Trowa smiled, but remained silent. _She really knows how to stroke a guy's ego. _He thought as he listened to their conversation.

"Yes, but…

"Then here's your chance to prove it."

"You aren't going to let up on this, are you?"

"No." If was final and Duo knew it.

"Alright, when do you want me to do it?"

"Will tomorrow work?" she asked turning towards Quatre.

"That's fine. Maybe with some luck we'll be able to get in."

"Luck has nothing to do with it." Duo said proudly. "It'll be all skill."

_Now she's done it. _Trowa thought. _She's stroked his ego just a little and now it's a big ego._ He let out a soft laugh. How he loved Dou, even if, at time he could be persuaded by pretty words. Tugging on Dou's arm, he pulled him back down so they could finish reading their book.

(o)(o)(o)

The following morning they arrived at Preventer's headquarters and were allowed to go straight to Lady Une. After explaining the purpose for hacking Heero's computer, leaving out that part about Janice sneaking a peek at his files, she reluctantly agreed.

While Duo went to get some coffee, knowing that it would take a lot of time to crack the infamous Yuy security code, Janice sifted through her desk to find the spare keys she had to Heero's office and desk. After locating them she opened his office allowing them all entrance before closing it behind them.

"I hope you brought something to do." Dou said taking his position behind the desk to start working. "This is going to take some time."

"I can wait." Quatre said sitting in a chair in front of the desk.

"I'm going to catch up on some files while I can. If you need anything let me know." Janice left the room and went to her own desk.

"Do you think you can get past his security?" Quatre asked as he looked around Heero's office.

"Yeah, but it'll be annoying." Duo said as he set upon the keyboard and starting the arduous task of breaking into Heero computer.

(o)(o)(o)

Ok, so here's yet another chapter. I didn't think I would get this one out so fast, but the good stuff happens in the next chapter. Had to get the slow one out of the way first. Sorry if it's a little short. If I don't cut if off here, I'll be way to long.


	5. Ch 5 An Assassin's Past

Ch. 5 An Assassin's Past

"Damn it!" Duo swore loudly as he put his face in his hands while his elbows rested on the desk.

Twelve hours and fifteen cokes later, he still had not made any progress since he had first started hacking into Heero's computer. He hadn't gotten very far when his stupid defense program started to run. Damn thing was as bad as Heero and just as stubborn. Nothing he had thought of was working and now he was out of ideas. Janice had already brought lunch and was now out to bring back some dinner.

"No luck." Janice said carrying three bags that contained dinner.

"Does it look like it?" Duo snapped as he looked up at her.

"You don't have to take it out on her." Quatre said accepting the bag of food she offered him.

"It's alright. I figured he would be angry, it was my suggestion after all." Janice's tone was still light with a hint of frustration.

Duo sighed leaning back in his chair as she set a Styrofoam box in front of him.

"I'm sorry Janice; I didn't me to take my frustrations out on you. It's Heero I'm pissed at, fricken paranoid, jerk."

She waved away his apology.

"Don't worry about it. I know how stubborn Heero can be at times." She sat down in the remaining chair. "I'm sure his security system is the same way he is. Besides, don't you think he has a right to be paranoid? We ARE trying to hack into his system, that's what it's there for."

"That's an understatement." Duo said before getting to work on his dinner.

So far they hadn't accomplished anything, just a lot of cursing and an occasional empty soda can thrown across the room. After the first few irritating hours Duo had relinquished control of the computer to Quatre to see if me might have any luck. When that failed Duo went back to work and had not let up until just now. Finally, at wits end, they were all beginning to think that Heero's infuriating security system would go un-cracked and they would have to find some where else to start.

By now Quatre was thoroughly infuriated with the man. Here he was trying to find Heero and Heero was the one locking them out of some potentially helpful information. He wanted to give him a good ass kicking when they found him and forbid him from ever put a security program on anything he owned. If they did not do something soon, the less of a chance they would be able to find Heero.

"Duo, are you sure you've tried everything?" Quatre asked once more, making damn sure that Duo had thought of everything.

"Quatre, I've already told you, I've done everything I can think of, except let Janice try and crack it." Duo said jokingly.

"Well, why don't we let her?" Quatre said in all seriousness. "We've tried everything else but that, why not see what happens."

"What?" Janice coughed as she choked on some food.

"If she cracks it I'm a fool." Duo said sliding over, taking his meal with him.

"Or you could just be to smart for your own good." She replied as she recovered and dragged her chair over to the other side of the desk. "Let's try something you didn't try." She cracked her fingers then started randomly typing things.

"What are you doing?" Quatre asked as he finished his meal and tossed the container away.

"She's just typing random things." Duo said before stuffing another fork full of food into his mouth.

In truth, she was not just typing away randomly, she did have some hacking skills, though they were not anywhere near as good as Duo or Heero's. It was just that she was typing at around a hundred words a minute so to the untrained eye it was random.

"Whoa! Back up!" Dou yelled nearly dumping his food onto the floor.

"What I do?" Janice asked, a hint of panic in her voice, but she backed up anyway.

"There!" he pointed excitedly at the screen as he pulled the key board over to his side. Duo did some fast work before announcing, "I'm in!"

Quatre turned to Janice with a stunned look on his face. Some how in her random typing she had managed to find a crack in Heero's security. After that, Duo easily slipped into the system avoiding any potential problems.

"Well," Duo stretched his arms above his head. "The hard part is done, I'm going home." He grabbed his jacket off the coat rack. "Call if you need me." He said, waving as he walked out the door.

"He was eager to get out of here." Janice said drawing the key board back in front of her. "If I know Heero, he would have stored his important files…." There was a pause as she searched in several different windows. "Here!" Closing out the unnecessary windows, she expanded the only one they were interested in. "This is the one he was working on not to long ago."

Quatre took up Duo's space as he sat down to read what Heero had been so adamant about researching without telling him. For the most part the file was about the research building and what had happened the previous year. Then, down at the very bottom was a name, Kain Renolds. After locating a second file it contained a picture of the man, the man Heero had killed the year before.

"I don't believe it." Quatre said almost breathlessly. "This is the guy we were tracking last year and we are looking at his military record."

He sat back and stared at it, he could not believe what he was looking at. They had thought that his record had been erased when he was discharged, but here it was, Heero had finally found it. He had to admit that the man had an impressive record.

During training he had had the best and highest scores for marksmanship over everyone else in the academy. From there Oz had decided to have him trained as a sniper, where he learned everything one would need to know about stealth, camouflage and basically how to hunt someone down. Not only that but he was proficient in hand to hand combat. The man was very close to being the perfect assassin.

While he served under Oz he had been given several special ops missions that had been kept secret from Oz commanders. In which case he was sent out to "dispose of", as they put it, certain people that were causing potential upstarts within the organization. There were other missions, the ones they already knew about from the file on unsolved murder cases. Apparently, after the wars ended he was discharged from his position when he couldn't follow orders when they reassigned him. From there all the other killings started. He could not accept the fast that the war was over so he punished those that had been key players during the war. People he blamed for bringing about peace, another reason he had targeted Heero.

"This guys a piece of work." Janice said as they finished the file.

"Yeah, but look here." Quatre pointed to a paragraph on the screen. "I thought it was odd that he was traveling alone."

"Looks like he and his partner went separate ways when he started killing in a time of piece."

"We should look into that more. Is there an address on this guy?"

Quatre watched as Janice quickly pulled up another window and typed in the name. A few seconds later they were given an address on the L2 colony. Unfortunately there was no phone number so they would have take a shuttle there.

"Back to space." Quatre grumble rather tiredly.

"I've never been to space." Janice said quickly, excitement getting the better of her.

Quatre stared at her in disbelief.

"You've never been to space?"

She shook her head before replying. "No actually, something always happened that prevented me from going."

"I think you'll enjoy this trip then."

Janice smiled back at them before reading the rest of the file. Intelligently, they printed out copies of everything that was of interest or might be of significance to their current situation. They did not want to have to go back through all of Heero's handy work to get back into the files. When they had everything they needed, the computer was logged out and turned off. Reporting their findings to Une, they headed back to Duo's house to repack their things and get on the first shuttle bound for L2.

(o)(o)(o)

Ok, not so much action as much as important info. I apologize for taking so long to post another chapter. Hopefully I'll stay on track better after this one.


	6. Ch 6 Friend or Foe

Ch. 6 Friend or Foe

Torture, it was the only way he could described the shuttle flight to L2. Luckily for Janice, she had dozed off somewhere around three in the morning while they sat at the terminal waiting for their flight. He on the other hand had remained awake, sleep stubbornly eluding him. Over and over again he had read the files they had brought and still, he could not find what Heero had been searching for.

When they finally boarded the shuttle, sleep quickly found her again while he, for some reason unknown to him, was being punished. On top of not being able to sleep, he had a wicked headache that he was sure was stress induced. He rubbed his temples, trying to relieve some of the pain. What had Heero been thinking? If he was going after this guy alone he should have at least notified someone. Then again, if Heero was trying to protect him from something, it would explain why no one knew where he was.

The pilot made the announcement that they would be landing soon so he gently shook Janice awake. After docking and finding their luggage, they headed out into the colony to find a place to stay. It did not take them long to find a hotel and after ten minutes of arguing with Janice about sharing a room, she finally caved and they were able to head up to their suite. Quatre did not want a recap of the previous year and was going to take all measures to prevent it, if possible.

With the colony engulfed in darkness, Quatre decided to attempt to get some rest while Janice opted for a shower. In the morning they would find Kain Renolds and hopefully find out what he was sure Heero already knew. Finally exhausted beyond measure, he was able to drift off to sleep, to tired to even think about what was going on.

(o)(o)(o)

"This is the place." Janice announced looking up from her scrap piece of paper with the address on it.

Quatre stared up at the small mansion they now stood before. Apparently, Kain Renolds made some really good money during the wars, but then again, officers normally do, especially retired ones. They walked up the front the stairs of the front porch and knocked on the door, Quatre keeping an eye out for anything suspicious. Janice knocked on the door.

"Can I help you?"

They were greeted by a strikingly beautiful woman in a pale blue summer dress, her brown hair hanging loosely past her shoulders. Her eyes were a brilliant shade of blue that shone even brighter in contrast to her dress.

"Yes, we're looking for Mr. Kain Renolds." Quatre said politely as he noticed two children run across the entryway hall.

"Please, come right in." she motioned for them to enter with her hand while she shut the door behind them. She guided them to the sitting room before leaving in search of her husband the kids eagerly following her.

"She seems nice." Janice said eagerly taking a seat.

"Looks can be deceiving." Quatre replied as he also took a seat while studying his surroundings.

"I don't think it applies in this case." She whispered, nudging him in the ribs to get his attention.

A man, Kain Renolds he presumed, now entered the room. He had dark brown hair with a few strands of grey. His black slacks and starched white shirt told them that he had come from work. There was pleasantness about the man that made him want to trust him, but like he had said before, look can be deceiving.

The man sat down across from them as his wife brought in a tray with tea. Setting it down on the table in front of them she escorted the children out of the room pulling the doors shut to allow them privacy.

"So the retired 04 pilot finally joined with the Preventers." Kain said smiling at the shocked expression on Quatre's face. "In truth I never thought you would join with them." He sipped casually at his tea.

Recovering from his shock, Quatre decided to continue with the course of conversation. The man used to work with Oz so it should not surprise him that the man already knew who he was.

"I'm only called in on special occasions." Quatre said as he also picked up a tea cup and drank from it.

"Then you are here for my old war buddy Therise. The 01 pilot was here but a few days ago inquiring about him. So this leads me to my next question, why are Preventers sending two agents for one mission that they aren't doing it together?"

Quatre decided that a little honesty would not hurt their cause.

"Well, Mr. Renolds….

The man put his hand up to stop him from continuing.

"It's just Kain, Mr. Renolds makes me feel like I have to be formal and I believe this is a casual call." He gave them a genuine smile that neither one could refuse to return.

"Well, Kain, our first agent has gone missing and we're trying to track him down. We came to find out what you might have told him so that we would know where to start." Quatre said setting his cup down on the table.

"Ah, I see. For starters, you shouldn't be looking for Therise because he died about a year ago."

Quatre was relieved to know that the story had not been leaked to the tabloid.

Kain continued. "Therise was always over the top when it came to his job. I think he enjoyed the killing a little to much. We went our separate ways after the war I didn't like where he was heading."

He watched as Kain rubbed his chin in thought.

"He did come to me last year saying that he had been given a special mission and wanted me to come along for old time sakes."

"But, you didn't." Janice put in after being silent for so long.

"No, I wanted peace as much as everyone else and I had a feeling that he was trying to destroy that. I didn't want any part in it."

"What happened when you refused him?" Quatre asked, intrigued.

"Last I heard, he had taken on a few apprentices, but two of them didn't work out."

"Two, you make it sound like there's more."

"Hmmm. Therise did mention one that he said would replace him if things went bad. What was his name?" Kain said the last part more to himself than to them. "Ah, Callum, he never mentioned a last name."

"Did Therise ever tell you what the mission was?"

Kain shook his head.

"No, just said that it was big and it would change the world. I remember staying up every night until he died praying that it wasn't war he was waging."

"You didn't happen to meet Callum did you?" Quatre had to find out who this guy was. They didn't have much to go with just his first name.

"Never had the chance. After talking with Therise, he just disappeared and the next thing I know I'm reading his obituary."

"Alright, well, thank you for your time Kain, we greatly appreciate it."

"No problem, if you need anything else don't hesitate to call. I'll help anyway I can."

"Thank you."

After seeing their way to the door, Quatre and Janice headed back to the hotel. Kain did not know much about Therise, but at least they had a name of his possible successor. They would have to search Oz's old database to see if there weren't any soldiers by the name of Callum. Even more boring and tedious work but it had to be done. At least now they were one step closer to finding Heero. The thought that there was another rogue assassin on the loose made him more than a little nervous, and if he wanted to start another war, they had to find him, fast.

Back at the hotel Janice ordered room service while he got to work on searching for the mysterious Callum. Even if we was a soldier for Oz they would have to track down his file which would mean even more tedious work. The knock at the door had him a little edgy after his last experience with room service.

Cautiously he opened the door but it was flung open before he could stop it and the next thing he knew, he was pinned to the wall. His mind flew, trying to grasp any opportunity for escape rape; he could not go through that again. He fought hard but made little progress.

When he noticed that his captor wasn't making any moves towards rape he started to wonder. It was then that he realized that he wasn't staring into the wild eyes of a rapist, but the cold, steely blue eyes of a very angry Heero.

(o)(o)(o)

Sorry it took so long to post another chapter. Writer's block totally took over and it took me forever to come up with anything. I should be on track now. Let me know what you think of this chapter.


	7. Ch 7 At Odds

Ch. 7 At Odds

Heero felt horrible when we saw Quatre's panic stricken face. His entrance was probably the worst thing he could have done and he was positive that it was brining back terrible memories for Quatre; memories they had both worked so hard to get rid of. Now, in one stupid move on his part, all those memories were flooding back and hitting Quatre full force. In that moment he wanted to pull his lover into his arms and whisper comforting words to him, but his features never softened. Quatre was in way to deep now and he had to get him out before things got worse.

The dawning looking on Quatre's face gave him hope that his move had not totally destroyed everything. When he felt Quatre's body sag beneath his hands with relief, he was glad that he possessed enough strength to hold him, otherwise he would have collapsed on the ground. The relief he saw held no anger behind it like he had thought there would be. Instead, it was more of a thankful look at seeing him alive and he was surprised by that.

He quietly hoped that Quatre would regain himself quickly now that his strength was fading, fast. This was not a fact that he would openly reveal to Quatre, however, the state he was in even shamed him as much as it worried Quatre. To his luck Quatre quickly stood up, staring at him intently.

"That's the last time I ever order room service."

Heero noted the wavering in Quatre's light, somewhat joking tone of voice, but did not comment about it. The light jest was out of place, but seemed to lighten the atmosphere considerably.

"That would be a wise decision." Heero responded in a stern tone before locating the nearest chair and collapsing in it.

Quatre closed the door before taking the chair across from him.

"What the hell do you think you're doing coming after me?" Heero demanded, still angry that Quatre had found him so easily.

"It's safer to be with you than anyone else."

That answer was not the one he had been expecting; it was also one that did not make sense. Quatre must have noticed his confusion and reached into his pocket.

"I received these a few days ago at the house, they're the reason I came to find you." He tossed the two business cards on the table that separated them.

Heero idly picked them up to stare at them before bolting upright in his chair. This was a new development in his case that he did not like in the least. He was hoping to keep Quatre out of this and never have to face the horrors of last time again, but it seemed this guy wanted them together. An eerie feeling crept over him and he was not sure how safe Quatre would really be with him.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Quatre asked not liking Heero's reaction.

Without a word Heero handed him two other business cards and after closer inspection, Quatre realized that they had his initials on them. Their new adversary wanted to take them together, that much was certain, but the why was what bothered him. They did not know why which made the case that much more difficult. He jumped when he heard the knock at the door as he was struck by a brief moment of panic.

"I'll get it." Janice said from the bed.

Heero had not even noticed there was another person in the room and he wondered why she was there in the first place. He watched as she held her gun in her left hand, pointed up, as she answered the door. It would be hidden by the door but easily accessible if needed. She cautiously opened the door as a man's voice floated into the room.

"Room service."

Heero watched her fake a cheery tone as she accepted the cart, tipped the man and sent him on his way. She re-holstered her weapon on her back where it would be hidden by her shirt, then pushed the cart up next to the table. He stared at her hard for a moment still trying to figure out why she was on the case and not a Preventer agent.

"What are you doing?" He demanded, even more enraged by the fact that Preventers thought it necessary to send him back up.

Quatre started but Janice cut him off.

"When Quatre brought this situation to Preventers, Une didn't know who to put on the case that this new assassin hadn't seen before. So, I volunteered to help out. I'm not without skill and I know how Preventers work."

Quatre noticed that Janice was covering for him and decided to stay out of it. A fight was not something they needed right now and if Janice was trying to diffuse the situation, he would go along with it.

"You aren't even a Preventer agent, Janice. They should have sent an undercover agent."

"Who better to send than I? The killer won't be expecting your secretary now would he?"

She had a point and he could not really argue that and he decided that he would not. At the moment he was too tired and hungry to fight over such trivial matters and from the worried look on Quatre's face, he must look dreadful. In all honesty he wanted it all to be done with so he could go home and spend the rest of his days in Quatre's arms, but life would not allow that for some reason. He was sure that fate was punishing him for his deeds during the wars.

"Do you have a place to stay?" Quatre asked him.

It unnerved him a little that Quatre knew him so well, but said nothing.

"I'll take that as a no, you can stay here with us then. There's plenty of room."

"I'll take the couch!" Janice chimed in, a little over enthusiastic about her new sleeping arrangement.

They both looked at her like she was crazy.

"What? The thing is huge when you pull it out and it's just as comfy as the bed."

Heero did not want to converse with them any longer and chose, instead, to leave for the shower and the promise of a large warm bed with Quatre. Something he had not had in the several months that had passed since he had last had time to spend with his lover.

(o)(o)(o)

Quatre stared after Heero's retreating back; he did not like what Heero had become. He had pale skin stretched over his painfully thin looking body; dull, listless eyes that seemed to hold nothing but anger. It looked as if he had not slept in days let alone eat. Something just wasn't right with the situation and he was determined to find out just what that was. Deciding that he could wait until after dinner, he joined Janice at the cart and began piling food onto a plate as well as a second one for when Heero finished his shower, but Heero never ate. After his shower he collapsed in the bed from exhaustion. It was obvious that, that was exactly what Heero had been doing the past few months, working hard and sleeping with little to no food.

While he and Janice played pool down stairs, he couldn't help but think about what was so important that Heero had to push himself to such extreme measures. That, he decided, was something that only Heero could tell him and the chances of that happening were slim to none. It was not like they really had a working relationship any more, Heero was always gone and he was always alone. Things just weren't working out like they had planned and most of that was Heero's fault. Later that night as he lay in Heero's embrace, one that had once brought him much love and comfort but now held none, he could not help but contemplate possibly leaving Heero.

(o)(o)(o)

Ok, I know it's been a while in updating and this is a short chapter, but for some reason I can't come up with anything to write. sigh It really sucks because I really like this story. Hopefully you like this chapter and maybe I'll have some more creativity after this one.


	8. Ch 8 Unnerving Discovery

Ch. 8 Unnerving Discovery

"You're not coming with me." Heero's voice was firm and commanding, it should have ended the discussion right there, but Quatre had other plans.

"Like hell I'm staying behind. It's not like you're in any condition to work this case anyway!" Quatre yelled back. He was not going to be brushed aside like some child that had discovered some dark secret.

"You don't know what we're up against."

"And you do? I don't think you know either."

Heero was becoming increasingly frustrated with Quatre. Why was he being so difficult?

"I'm doing this to protect you, Quatre. I don't want another recap of last time."

"You stopped protecting me when you choose work over me!" He bit down on his lower lip, instantly ashamed of what he had just let slip out. His words had hurt Heero and they could not be taken back.

Heero could not believe what Quatre had just screamed at him and he could tell from the way Quatre chewed on his lower lip that he had not meant for that to come out. If that was what he thought, then why was he working so hard to stop a man that desperately wanted Quatre dead? No, he would keep fighting just as he always had and if Quatre could not understand that, then he would have to live with that. He also knew that nothing he said could change Quatre's view on the matter either, that much was clear.

"I know you don't want to, but you just have to trust me on this Quatre."

Was there a hint of pleading in Heero's voice? Quatre could not be sure. He bit his lower lip harder to hold back the other words he ached to throw at Heero. Now was not the time for that, it also wasn't the time for bickering.

"Fine." Quatre lowered his head in defeat. "I'll stay here."

Heero knew damned well that Quatre was just conceding to end the fight, but he was not going to argue with it. Right now he had to find this guy before Quatre did. Without another word he left the room.

Quatre slumped down in a chair feeling somewhat drained from the whole argument. It never should have happened, but Heero was doing what he thought was best for him. He was not going to let that stop him, however, he could be just as stubborn as Heero. Standing, he sought out his weapons and the files. Heero had a head start and they did not have much to go on, but that had never stopped him before.

"We going after him?" Janice asked as she located her own weapons and hid them on her person. She gave him a devious smile that told him she had not been fooled when he had told Heero he would stay behind.

"Do you even have to ask?" He returned his smile with one of his own. It was nice to have someone on his side for a change. It was the kind of support he was going to need when he left Heero.

(o)(o)(o)

Not long after leaving the hotel, they found themselves following Heero down a dark alleyway and into an abandoned warehouse. Quatre could not help but think how cliché it all was, but if it led them to the killer they could meet in a bathroom for all he cared. Hiding out of sight behind some broken down, rusty machinery, they made themselves comfortable not knowing how long a wait it would be until Heero met up with his contact. Neither of them said a word as they waited, watching Heero stand patiently in the middle of the warehouse.

After what felt like hours sitting in a cramped position they heard the bang of the side door as someone entered. Readjusting to see better Quatre and Janice leaned forward to see better. With any luck they would be able to find out who this Callum was.

(o)(o)(o)

His informant was late, making him a little uneasy about the meeting, but if he did not go through with it he would not find out what Callum wanted. The informant said that he had some demands and if they were met, everything would go away, or, at least that is what was being said. If felt strange to stand to go into a meeting weaponless, though he did have a knife hidden in his boot, it wouldn't do much good if he could not reach it in time.

The banging of the side door alerted him that his informant had arrived. From the way the man looked around he could tell he was just as unsettled by the meeting as he. When his informant was close enough for him to get a good look at him in the dimly lit warehouse, he was shocked to see a mere child of fourteen, possibly fifteen. He would not under estimate the boy though, after all, at fifteen he was an elite gundam pilot deciding the fate of mankind.

"Are you alone?" the boy asked still scanning the warehouse carefully.

"Yes." Heero replied wanting to get his information quickly and get out. "What are his demands?"

"They're more like options than demands." The boy snickered

Heero's temper flared for a moment but he kept a tight rein on it. "What are his options then?"

"As you've already discovered he wants the both of you," the boy paused making Heero want to strike him. "But, he has decided that he'll settle for one of you."

"Alright."

"You have a choice, do you live knowing that beautiful blonde boyfriend of yours suffered a torturous death or do you give your life to save his?"

The sadistic smile on the boy's face had Heero itching give him a beat down, but the urge would have to wait, it was possible that the opportunity would never come again.

"He can have me." Heero said not pausing to think about the decision. He would never let anyone hurt Quatre and if his death meant Quatre's life, then so be it.

"Always the sacrificial one. I wonder if your blonde prince will ever know how much you love him." The boy cocked his head to one side. "Or will you take that to your grave?" He turned and walked back to the side door. Before Heero could speak, he called over his shoulder, "I'll contact you in the usual manner and tell you where to go." The slam of the metal door ending the meeting.

Heero stood in the middle of the room feeling more exhausted than ever. All he wanted was to return to the hotel and hold Quatre one last time, tell him everything even if he did not believe him, at least he would know, but Quatre was angry. He was angry with the thought that he had chosen work over him. In a way he was right, but if it had not been for work he would not have known this guy was out for them. Everything he had done had been for them, but Quatre only saw it as an excuse. As badly as he wanted to go back and explain everything, he knew he could not. If he did he would never leave and this psycho would follow them. With no where to go Heero left the warehouse to wander aimlessly until he returned to the crap hole he had been living in for the past few months.

(o)(o)(o)

Quatre was shocked to find the informant to be a mere child, but the unsuspecting ones were always children. The meeting was short and to the point, much how Heero always ways, but when the options were given and Heero gave his answer without hesitation, he tried to object. With a hand clamped firmly over his mouth, Janice had silenced that opportunity whispering that they needed to know where Heero would need to go. When a location was not revealed Quatre was even more depressed. It had become obvious that Heero had been think about his welfare from the start, it sucked that he had to find it the hard way.

When the informant and Heero had left, Quatre slumped against the machinery with the over whelming urge to cry. He could not believe how blind he had been to all of this, yet, he was not the only one to blame. Heero should have shared some of this information with him but he understood why he felt he could not. He covered his face with his hands. Things had spiraled out of control so fast and he was just falling with no end in sight. A slight tug from Janice had him alert to his surroundings immediately. They still needed to know where this was going to take place.

"I'm sorry Quatre," he could see the sympathy in her eyes, "but we need to follow that kid so that we can track him down later."

Agreeing and eager to put his mind on anything but Heero, he followed her out of the warehouse and into the alleyway. It was not hard to catch up to the boy though they kept their distance to keep from being to obvious in their following. When the boy entered a run down building Janice wrote down the address and the room number before they made the long trek back to the hotel.

When they finally arrived at the hotel, Quatre hoped that Heero would be up stairs in the room, but deep down he knew Heero would not be there. The silence weighed heavily in the room as Janice set to work finding out more about Callum while he sat in front of an off television set. His mind, frantically trying to figure things out, was coming up with nothing.

As the sun finally began to set Janice had found what they had been looking for. Apparently, during the wars Oz had a private faction that handled all interrogations. The faction had just recently been discovered by Preventers through an ex undercover agent that had gone missing during the wars. For the most part that faction did routine interrogations that would not be consider suspicious to anyone, however, there had been one interrogator that often resorted to torture in his methods. Once Oz discovered this, they surprisingly disbanded the faction.

Callum, or rather, Thomas Callum, was much like Therise and did not appreciate being fired. After that Oz lost track of him, but he reappeared a few years ago when he had met Therise. From his background Quatre could tell why Callum and Therise had hit it off. Callum had a sadistic taste for death, a death that he would bring up close and personal with his own hands. Inside his file were countless unsolved murders that all carried the same MO.

If Heero was willingly giving himself over to this guy, Quatre did not want to think of the horrors that would be inflicted up Heero. Gathering his weapons and Janice in hot pursuit, he went for the only person that could tell them where Heero was going and if the little brat wanted to be stubborn, then he would do what was necessary.

(o)(o)(o)

Ok, yet another long delay in chapters I know, but I haven't forgot about this story! It's just moving slower than I had originally intended.


	9. Ch 9 A Painful Sacrifice

Ch. 9 A Painful Sacrifice

Quatre and Janice wasted no time getting to the run down apartments they had followed the informant to earlier that day. He prepared himself for the worst, if this kid was working for Callum, who knows what he was capable of. Weapons drawn, they entered the building and cautiously ascended the stairs. It was eerily quiet in the building with only their light footsteps on the stairs to keep their senses grounded. It was when total silence set in that Quatre knew things would get dangerous. He could only hope that Janice knew enough to keep herself alive.

Standing outside the only apartment with a door, he stopped, listening for any movement from beyond the door. He tried the doorknob; it was unlocked and did not make a sound when he turned it slightly. They held their breath as he cracked the door open and take a quick glance inside. The entryway was clear, but he could not be sure. Pushing the door open a little more, he and Janice slipped in and made a quick search of the area, nothing.

Every part of his body was on edge, he wanted nothing more than the charge in recklessly; find that brat and demand information, but caution warned him not to heed that urge, as tempting as it was. A muffled sound from the back bedroom had him instantly alert, only the pounding of his heart in his ears drowned out all other noise. Prepared for anything, he crept to the bedroom and swung the door open, hoping for the element of surprise. To his amazement, it actually worked. The boy was sitting on a bed playing video games just like any other child would. When the door burst open he stared at them stunned for a second before moving into action.

He made a dive for something on the desk but Janice beat him to it and managed to push him back onto the bed as she secured the weapon. When he made a bolt for the window Quatre grabbed him by the back of the shirt and threw him up against the wall, his anger overriding all else. Positive that the kid was not going anywhere, he looked around the room. Apparently he had been paid well by Callum. While the apartment complex was run down, this apartment was extremely well furnished or at least this room was.

There was a brand new stereo and sound system placed high on the shelves with a new state of the television, computer and the latest game system with hundred of new market games to with it. Even the bed was new.

Seeing how well the brat had been paid to ruin his life and Heero's only fueled his rage further. Securing his own weapon he held the boy with two hands and slammed him against the wall hard enough to knock the wind out of him.

"You're going to tell me everything, is that clear?" he demanded, not recognizing his own voice anymore.

"And if I don't?" the boy sneered.

Quatre slammed his head into the wall while drawing his gun and pressing it against the underside of the boy's chin.

"You'll tell me or I'll kill you." There was an icy chill in his voice that he had never heard before. From the look on the boys face and even Janice's, he could tell that they weren't expecting the normally passive 04 pilot to act in such a manner. Well, it was time he shook the push over reputation people had of him. "Now, I want to know what you told Heero and where he's headed."

The boy nodded mutely to afraid to say anything and Quatre realized that he had probably never been caught before.

"If I found out you lied to me in anyway you'll see just how ruthless I can be." It wasn't an empty threat, his life had been torn apart the past year and he was not in the mood to deal with childish ways. "And after you've finished telling me what I want to know, I'm having you arrested for aiding and abetting."

The fear in the boy's eyes told Quatre that there would be no lies. While he had helped Callum, he was still just a child and not one suited for the warriors life.

(o)(o)(o)

Heero stepped into the house the informant had directed him to. Unlike its run down exterior, the inside was extremely well cared for and lavishly decorated. Large old style tapestries hung from the walls with elaborate chandeliers hanging from the ceilings. Expensive artwork adorned the walls, clustered around the entrance then spacing out the further you walked into the house. He was surprised when he walked in and no one had greeted him, at the same time it made him very uneasy. Normally, in this situation he would have already explored the house and would now be hunting Callum down, but he was tired of fighting a ghost. No one ever saw Callum or met with him, yet he managed to make life hell for everyone.

Taking the stairs he walked down the hallway wondering where the hell this guy was. There was a sound from the room to his left causing him to instinctively reach for the weapon he did not have. The door creaked open and a man in his late twenties emerged, his tall, lithe body barely blocking his view of Callum's latest victim. Right then he wanted to pull the knife from his boot that he had secretly hidden there, and kill Callum, but he needed answers, answers a dead man could not give him.

"Ah, Heero."

The man's voice had a sickly sweet tone that sent a chill up Heero's spine, though he kept that to himself.

"I didn't think you would show up." Callum began wiping his hands on a towel that Heero noticed was now covered in blood. "Now, if you would continue down the hall, you'll be in the room at the end on the right. I'd like to clean up if you don't mind."

There was something in the man's voice that he did not like and instinct told him to stay put until Callum was done, but when Callum retreated behind the door he had emerged from, Heero felt a little safer walking down the hall. Still on edge he continued on his way while casting a careful glance over his shoulder to make sure he wasn't being followed. As he entered the room he had been directed to, there was a searing pain in the side of his neck as everything blacked out.

(o)(o)(o)

Quatre waited while Janice talked to the Preventer agents they had called in to take away Callum's informant. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, impatient to be on their way and after Heero. When Janice had finished she informed him that she had instructed the agents to follow, but stay out of sight and that they would alert them when they were needed. Not really caring what Preventers did, Quatre started on his way.

According to Jay, the informant, Callum's house was not far away, but had warned them to go on foot to make it easier for them to slip in unnoticed. He constantly checked his weapons, making sure they were secured and for comfort. If they reached Heero to late, Callum would regret everything he had ever done and so much more.

(o)(o)(o)

The pounding in his head increased ten fold when he tried to open his eyes. When he went to rub his temple to try and relieve some of the pain he became aware that his hands were bound to something above his head. Feeling around he discovered it to be a post of some sort. Trying to move his feet he found them bound as well, though apart instead of together. It was also very cold in the room and whatever he was laying on was extremely hard.

When his eyes finally adjusted and the throbbing subsided he was mortified at what he saw. He was stripped naked and strapped down to something that could be considered a cross between an autopsy table and a gynecologist's table. Bound was not the right word either, he was shackled! Not only that but his feet were up in stirrups like he was giving birth, shackles on his ankles and his butt just past the edge of the table. He looked around frantically looking for Callum; it was obvious he had been behind all this.

"Don't look so confused, Heero. You came willing, and now you'll die willingly." Callum sneered as he came around the corner, naked from the waist down.

"I did, but you'll find no satisfaction in my death." Heero would make damned sure that Callum received no pleasure from torturing him.

"Oh, I will."

Callum approached the table and stood between his open legs. Leaning over he trailed kisses up his abdomen before taking a nipple in his mouth. He watched in pleasure at the nonexistent feelings on Heero's face.

Heero felt sick. Rape had not been in his plans when he had decided to confront Callum. In fact, he still needed answers, but his disgust was starting to override his mission. The man certainly was perverted and deranged, but he could not do anything about that now. What he could do was get information and hope that someone was on the way.

"Why did you target us." He asked keeping his voice cold and even as Callum slammed into using little to no lube at all. "Was it because I killed your partner?"

Callum moved inside Heero while giving his answer. "At first it was revenge, but the more I tracked your every move it became more. Revenge had changed to lust which, at one point, changed to love."

"You're sick!" Heero spat when Callum plunged painfully deeper as he fought to keep his mask in place.

A moan escaped Callum as he began to reach his climax but seeing that Heero still showed no fear, pain or any emotion what so ever, decided to pull out a nasty trick from his little black bag.

"Don't you love it? Us?" Callum leaned down over Heero, momentarily becoming still from his rhythmic motion. "We are…beautiful."

Heero heard the distinct sound of a blade running across metal when it was suddenly thrust into his side. The searing pain that shot up his side almost destroyed his visage, but somehow me managed to hold it, stubbornly refusing to give Callum the pleasure of seeing him weak, vulnerable.

"Don't you recognize this blade?"

Callum yanked the weapon out of his side and Heero could feel his blood flow steadily from his body, heard it dripping onto the floor. Weakness soon followed as his tormentor held the still bloody knife before his face.

"This is the knife that was intended for me wasn't it?"

Heero gave no reply.

"Tell me!" Callum screech as he plunged the knife deep between his ribs, burying the knife to the hilt.

This move did shatter his façade as a gasp escaped his mouth and he tipped his head back desperately trying to breath. He closed his eyes trying to shut out the pain and shortly after, the impending death when Callum removed the knife and a horrible wheezing sound came from his lungs. A punctured lung, what a way to go. He fought hard trying to put himself anywhere but the here and now. There was a commotion in the background, but started to fade as blackness started to creep over him, his body becoming cold.

A familiar voice caused him to fight off the black void, if only for a moment. He tried to focus on who was standing over him. Their words were unintelligible and difficult to make out. His vision never cleared and he never discovered who the voice belonged to as he gave into the darkness.

(o)(o)(o)

Quatre stood on the front porch, weapon drawn as was Janice's. He threw a glance over his shoulder to make sure that ambulance was in position just in case they needed it. The front door was unlocked just as Jay had told them it would be. Clearing all the front rooms they made a quick move in the upstairs, but the house was empty.

"Shit!" Quatre swore loudly as he ran a shaky had through his hair. "Where the hell is this guy?" His patience was gone and he would not hesitate to kill the bastard if he hurt Heero in anyway.

"There has to be something we missed." Janice stated looking around that hallway.

"We don't have time to 'miss' something." Quatre bit back throwing his fist into the wall. The hollow sound he received pus an evil smile on his face. Feeling along the wall he found a small indent, one that no one would see unless they were looking in the right spot. With a slight tug an invisible door opened inwards leading them to a set of stairs. The strong smell of bleach and disinfectant assaulted their senses.

"A private torture chamber?" Janice inquired softly as they made their way down.

"Several apparently." Quatre answered when he entered a long corridor deep beneath the house with several rooms on each side. "We'll have to look in each one."

To their luck, there was a small window at the top of the door that made it easy for them to check each room. Several had dismembered, mutilated bodies that Callum had obviously not discard yet, but to their dismay, there were a few still alive and untouched in the last few rooms. Janice radioed that information back to the Preventer agents, warning them not to enter until their suspect was dead or in custody.

There was only one room left and they cocked their guns. It was the only place left for Heero to be. Quatre held his breath as he looked threw the window. The sight that greeted him made him nauseous and angry at the same time. Without thinking he threw open the door just in time to see Callum pull the knife from Heero's ribcage.

He vaguely remembered yelling at Callum to put the knife down and when he refused Quatre lost all sense of time or reality. Before he knew if, Callum was dead and he was staring into the ashen face of his dieing lover. He did not remember Janice calling for the ambulance or brining over a discarded blanket so the paramedics would not find Heero in such a humiliating situation. Somewhere in there Janice found keys to the shackles and released Heero from his restraints.

"Hold on Heero." Quatre whispered as he applied pressure to one of the wounds, slowing the bleeding until the paramedics could arrive. Heero's eyes fluttered open but they were cloudy and unfocused. Tears flowed freely soaking the blanket that covered Heero's naked body.

"You can't leave me." Quatre whispered into his ear so that only Heero could hear him. "I still need you, I love you. Don't leave me." Quatre continued on in his dazed ramble until Heero was carried away and Janice was leading him out of the house.

The car ride, like much of everything else that had happened, went by in a blur and he did not care. He focused all his attention on Heero and his condition. The grim looks he had seen on the paramedics faces did not give him much hope and the fact that they had already resuscitated him once brought little comfort or hope. He would have to face the fact that Heero was not going to survive his sacrifice.

(o)(o)(o)

I hope you enjoy this chapter. This is more or less where the story started. Lol Sorry about the long delay.


	10. Ch 10 A Stranger on his Arm

Ch. 10 A Stranger on his Arm

Something soft brushed against the back of his hand. Straining to open his eyes and focus them, he was greeted by an extreme headache that demanded he keep his eyes shut. His whole body felt week, like it had not moved in weeks; just lifting his hand off the bed was a chore. As the pain in his head subsided he tried again, this time only opening his eyes into slits, just enough to see what was on his hand.

Lying contentedly at his side was Zeus. He stared for a moment, more confused than anything. Where had the cat come from? Zeus was back on Earth and the last he knew, he was in the colonies. He closed his eyes again while idly rubbing his finger against Zeus' soft fur. Nothing was making sense any more, he did not care either. Odd, for the first time he felt things were going to be alright, that he did not need to worry about what was going to happening in the next moment.

He heard the door to his hospital room and cracked an eye to find out. Thought his vision was blurred he could tell it was not Quatre and that was all he needed to know. Whoever it was came close to the bed and lifted Zeus from the bed. The sudden loss of the familiar warmth made him uneasy.

"You need to decide what you're going to do." Came a rough voice.

Heero instantly recognized the voice as Rasid. Obviously there was a reason he was in his room and not Quatre. Rasid never talked to him unless he was concerned about Quatre. That thought made him a litter nervous, whatever Rasid had to say, would not be good.

"This is the second time Master Quatre has been hurt."

His eyes instantly snapped open despite the blinding pain it caused. He tried to climb out of bed but a set of strong hands held him down.

"Emotionally Heero."

He relaxed back into the pillows, eyes closed again.

"To be blunt, he's been through hell and you either need to be there for him or leave. It's as simple as that." Rasid set Zeus back down on the bed and left.

Heero felt emotionally, as well as physically, drained. Rasid was right; he had forced Quatre along unknowingly into his troubles and then disappeared when he was needed most. It was not fair to Quatre and he knew the strain he was putting on his relationship. Things had to stop now before they got any worse and something terrible happened.

He ran his hand gently over Zeus' back, relaxing more and more with each pass over the silky coat. Before long he was asleep but still contemplating what he would do about Quatre.

(o)(o)(o)

He was finally going home. After spending a month in physical therapy, which he hated, they were releasing him. It turns out he had been in a coma for the past month or two that even the doctors weren't sure he would come out of. Now that he was being discharged from the hospital would come the moment he would have to inform Quatre of his decision. While stuffing what few possessions had been brought to him into a bag he heard the door to his room open. He tensed a little knowing what was to come, but hid it behind his usual mask.

Zeus jumped up on the bed for some petting which Heero readily obliged, allowing some of his tension to escape. When Zeus hoped off the bed and headed for Quatre Heero knew the time had come. Still pained by his decision, he hid behind the soldier mask that had always protected him in the past before turning around.

"You ready to leave then?" Quatre asked happily as he scooped Zeus up into his arms.

Heero had the urge to say yes and just walk out the door, but he knew it was the wrong thing to do.

"I'm not going home." He stated bluntly.

"I figured that. You probably want to get back to Preventers and report what happened first. I'll drive you there." Quatre turned to head out the door hoping Heero would not do what he feared he would.

"No, Quatre. I can't be with you any more." He thought his voice faltered but he held his ground.

Quatre froze, his worst fear becoming reality. Just when he needed Heero most, again, he was being left behind, cold and alone. His mind screamed out for him to protest, argue some sense into Heero but he knew it would be in vain.

"I understand." Quatre said his voice as cold and emotionless as Heero's. Knowing the situation was over he continued out the door with no destination in mind.

Quatre's cold tone had him on the verge of running out the door after him, but it was for the best that they separated. He could not keep putting Quatre through this kind of punishment day in and day out. His job prevented him from having a real life and he could not make everyone around him suffer for it. Still, he felt as if a piece of him had died when the door had shut behind Quatre's retreating back.

(o)(o)(o)

The following week was not much better than the previous. People in his office had refused to talk to him when word spread that he and Quatre were no longer together. Only Janice still talked to him, however rare that was now that she had been promoted to a Preventer agent after her work with Quatre. While she was still his secretary, she was often gone on assignment. After doing a little background check, he discovered a lot about her, but never brought it up.

She had served during the war as an undercover agent within the Oz ranks. Her hacking abilities could rival Duo's along with his own, which is probably how she managed to gain access into his computer. Not only that but, her personality had everyone trusting her allowing to gain rank in Oz's troops. She had been allowed access to valuable information during the war.

On top of that she had done well to cover up her tracks within Oz and after the war. It had taken him the better part of the week to find any information on her at all. For whatever reason she did not want people to know about her past and he did not intend to disrupt her hard work. With the war over she was a valuable asset to the Preventers and was providing them with more contacts every day concerning sensitive cases. Janice would do well in Preventers.

He, on the other hand, had drowned himself in work trying to keep him mind occupied, but late at night, while he lay awake in his bed, he could not help but think of Quatre. More and more he doubted his decision about breaking up with him. Quatre knew the risks of being with him and he had accepted them. At the same time Heero could not expect Quatre to keep up with the ever changing torrent of emotions that came with his job. Still, life seemed so empty and meaningless without him.

Shaking his head he forced himself to concentrate on the file he had been working on. Quatre would move on just as he would eventually and things would be normal again, or at least he hoped they would. At that moment Janice choose to walk into his office giving him yet another excuse not to concentrate on work.

Giving him a halfhearted smile, she set more files down on his desk. "Une says that these are to be finished by the end of the day." Janice said on her way back to the door.

Heero flipped through the files realizing they were the files he had just finished the day before.

"I already did these." He stated flatly.

"I know, but they were done wrong, Une wants them done correctly this time. I already fixed the files from the rest of the week, but I don't have time for those. I'm leaving on assignment."

_Fixed the files form the rest of the week. _How had he been so out of it that Janice was now double checking his work? It must have been some minor work here and there, nothing major.

"Thanks Janice, I'll have these to Une by the end of the day."

Just as she began to shut the door, Heero could not help but ask, he needed someone's input.

"Janice?" he asked, a little nervously.

"Yes, you screwed up, now would you fix it already." She was blunt to the point, the way she had always been with him.

"I wasn't talking about the files."

"I know." The door closed behind her ending the discussion.

He sat in stunned silence. Was he that obvious? How had he fallen apart so quickly and not even notice it? Angry with himself he furiously set to work on the file he had been on so that he could finish the others before five. It was Friday and he planned to leave his apartment and do a little drinking.

(o)(o)(o)

That evening on his way home he passed by the restaurant that he and Quatre had gone to almost every week, at least during the time between the two major cases that nearly got them both killed. Passing by the large front window he saw two familiar faces. Stopping to get a better look he discovered Janice and Quatre sharing dinner together. Quatre was smiling and laughing, something he had not seen in some time. He could tell that Janice was excited about something. He could not watch any more and continued on his way. It was becoming painfully aware that Quatre had moved on.

At the club, as he sat at that bar being hit on by unattractive men and drowning himself in alcohol, he heard familiar voices again. Turning on the bar stool he saw Janice and Quatre, but they were accompanied by another man, a very attractive one at that. The group seemed quite happy chatting about who knows what and laughing. It hurt to see Quatre so happy with another man. Downing his drink his paid the bartender and left before he became angry and in his drunkenness, did something irrational.

(o)(o)(o)

I know! It's been a long time between posts. I'm really sorry for that. Hope you all enjoy this chapter! Thanks for all the reviews!


	11. Ch 11 Awakened in the Night

Ch. 11 Awakened in the Night

Heero laid awake in bed, staring at the stark white ceiling above him as lights flashed across the walls with the occasional passing car; another sleepless night to rack up with all the others. Reaching over to the nightstand, he grabbed the remote and turned on his stereo, drowning out the silence before rolling on his side to face the empty spot Quatre had once occupied. The apartment seemed so cold and empty now that he was the only resident.

With a sigh he rolled onto his back and closed his eyes, willing sleep to come. Instead, he was greeted by some of his worst memories from the year past, the better moments amongst the chaos and misery.

(o)(o)(o)

"Let go!" There were tears steaming down his face.

Quatre had just learned about the death of the two CEOs in charge of Winner Enterprise's sister companies. He'd held him then, while Quatre broke down and fought to escape not only him, but the truth about what was going on. He had called him little one, catching both of them off guard. He could remember the scent of Quatre's hair and how soft it had felt against his skin.

There was the time he had found him asleep in the bath tub. Quatre had asked him not to go and called his name. Those beautiful lips, so soft and sensual, that had enticed a kiss from him, a kiss that to this day, he did not regret. He had wondered what Quatre had been dreaming about that would have him saying his name, even in sleep. That same evening, Quatre had unconsciously backed up into him for warmth as they lay in bed. How perfectly he had fit against him with the soft scent of lavender mixed with a hint of vanilla. That same aroma had put him to sleep many times after that. The first time he had woken up with Quatre comfortably curled up against his body, head resting on his chest. He would never forget that moment.

Then, it seemed as if his whole world had come crashing down on him. During the case he had left Quatre alone in the hotel room for what he had thought would be a short time. He had ended up being delayed and came back in time to hear Quatre scream out as a man raped him. That had been the first time he had completely lost it and killed a man out of pure rage. His Quatre had been hurt, violated, and he had not been there to stop it.

Not long after, his entire world stopped, standing still for all eternity. They had finally figured out where the killer was hiding and he had left Quatre behind to find him. He never could have anticipated the outcome of that day. Even now he still had nightmares about what had happened.

He had tracked the killer to an abandoned building, crumbling from years of abandonment. Their confrontation had taken place up stairs in a room that had been set up to track his movements through the building. A shoot out had started then when he had stupidly thought he had killed the man by mercilessly shooting him, only to find that he wore a bullet proof vest. The firing continued while he questioned the man, trying to get every ounce of information he could before he killed him.

From his carelessness he ended up in a position that guaranteed his death, but fate seemed to have a different agenda for him. Quatre had come out of no where and taken a bullet in the chest, the bullet meant for him. Everything had moved slowly after that. He remembered the sickening sound of a punctured lung followed by the crimson blood that had spread across the front of Quatre's shirt. Quatre had looked up at him then, his skin pale with a mix of shock and pain etched upon his face. Quatre had reached for him, as if he would never see him again and at that moment, Heero feared he never would. Again, fate had intervened and gave him a second chance, keeping Quatre alive in time for the paramedics to take over.

Quatre had almost left his life forever that day and he had done nothing to prove how grateful he was for the fact that he had not. Work, he always buried himself in work to cover up for all his wrong doings, thinking that if he did not acknowledge them, they did not exist. Still, every time Quatre needed him, in the past and present, he had never been around. When he was needed most, he was not there.

Still, he repeated the same mistakes as he had in that past with their most recent venture. He'd had a fight with Quatre and stalked out of the house right to the Preventers headquarters.

The alarm went off by his head telling him that it was now six in the morning. The massive headache that greeted him along with the alarm told him he had drank too much the night before. He deserved it for trying to drown himself in alcohol and self pity. He would consider it a lesson learned and not repeat it.

Somehow, during his reminiscing, he had fallen asleep, but things seemed to be clear to him. In all the times past he had left Quatre, alone, in his most vulnerable moments, when he should have been at his side. Now was no different, he was gone when Quatre still needed him. He had thought that by leaving Quatre he would protect him from the hurt he knew he would cause, but what about the hurt that would happen without him there? By leaving him he had emotionally hurt Quatre and that was not something he would have weighing on his mind.

Sluggishly, he rolled over and slapped the alarm clock off. It was too early for him to be up after what he had done the night before. He slowly climbed out of bed to locate the aspirin and a bottle of water. When that was done he collapsed back into bed deciding to sleep off his hangover, it beat suffering through the rest of the day with it.

(o)(o)(o)

Quatre sat behind his enormous office desk pouring over the list of guests that had already RSVP'd to his party invite. He had been shocked to find WuFei's name on the list, he'd never attended in the past, and he always had work to do. This was worth questioning when he ran into him at the party tonight. There were several other names on the roster, almost everyone he had invited. One name in particular was not on the roster, however, at the same time he had expected it not to be.

Heero had not answered his initiation, as he'd expected him not to. They were over and had not spoken to one another since that day in the hospital. Zeus still kept him company, though even the cat missed Heero's presence in the house. Things were just that much more empty and lonely with just the two of them. At the same time, he couldn't remember the last time it _wasn't_ just the two of them.

Quatre shook his head and shuffled the papers back in order and tucked them into his briefcase. He couldn't dwell on the past anymore, he needed to look ahead. Everything lay to the future and tonight, he would have a good time and enjoy the company of his friends. Who knew, maybe some tall, dark, handsome man would sweep him off his feet tonight.

(o)(o)(o)

Heero rolled over some time later to find that it was four in the afternoon. With his hangover over almost completely gone it was finally time for him to do something constructive with himself. Climbing out of bed he slipped into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt before heading to the kitchen for some food, something he desperately needed. After sitting down on the couch with a slice of cold pizza, he let the memories flood over him.

They were horrible memories, ones that never should have happened. The more he thought about them the less he could remember the better times. It was becoming more and more difficult to remember the last time Quatre had smiled or called out his name in the heat of passion. Had there ever been a happy time between them? A time that wasn't tainted with near death experiences or being hunted by crazed men that couldn't adapt? He didn't want to think any more about it, what's done is don't and he couldn't change it.

Not knowing what else to do, he located his shoes by the door and grabbing his keys off the table, he headed down stairs. There was no real goal or destination in mind; he just couldn't stand to be in his apartment any longer. Down in the lobby he checked his mail and found only one letter or at least, that's what he'd thought it was. Locking his mail box and leaving the building, he took a closer look at the letter.

It had familiar handwriting on it, Quatre's to be exact. Looking at the mailing date, it had been mailed four days ago. Heero opened the letter, a little nervous as to what he would find inside. He found an invitation to a formal black and white masquerade ball with instructions for him to wear black with as little white as possible. He skipped down to the bottom requesting him to RSVP by, tonight. The party was tonight at eight and he didn't even have anything to wear.

(o)(o)(o)

Ok, that's all I have for this chapter. I can't think of anything to add some I'm posting it as is. I promise that the next chapter will be awesome! Sorry about the delays on this one. I know I told people it would be posted quickly.  I'll try harder with the next chappy. Have tons of ideas for that one.


	12. Ch 12 New Begginings

Ch. 12 New Beginnings

Quatre stood the on one of the small second story balconies that over looked what could be considered a ball room. He had decided to use the main estate for the party since all his sisters were gone for the weekend. That and there was no way he could fit this many people inside the small mansion he normally resided in.

The scenery bellow was like a masterpiece of art as his black and white clad guests moved about the floor. Most of the people he could recognize from the mask they wore; chosen from something that most closely reflected their personalities. It was made even easier since only men wore black and woman, white. He was the only one adorned in both; it was his way to set the host apart from the guests.

Quatre watched as more guests filtered in through the front door after showing their invite to James, the butler. He was excited when Trowa and Duo entered the room. It was easy to pick them out from the other guests. Trowa wore a black version of his mask from the days he'd spent with Catharine in the circus. Duo, well he couldn't really tell what Duo's was from his spot, but the braid was unmistakable. As he started to turn to head down stairs to greet Duo and Trowa, something caught his eye.

Stopping, he leaned far out over the balcony, straining to see who it was, if he weren't so high up, he could have sworn it was Heero. He tried to lean out a little further, desperately trying to locate the man when one of his feet slipped out from under him. He grabbed the railing, frantically trying to get himself upright before he toppled headfirst over the rail. Suddenly, there was a strong arm around his waist, pulling him away from the rail and onto the safety of the balcony. He faintly recognized the smell of the person now holding him, but he couldn't see who it was since he was turned away from his rescuer. As his mind came under control and he was able to think clearly, the stranger released him. When he turned to thank him, there was no one there.

Still a little shook up from his near death experience and his inability to find out who the stranger was, Quatre headed downstairs toward his original destination. He found Trowa and Duo standing directly bellow the balcony he had almost fallen from. That thought was a little embarrassing, so he decided not to tell them about it. Looking at Duo and Trowa in their all black tuxes, he couldn't help but think about how attractive Heero might look in one, but he quickly suppressed that thought. Tonight would be a night of fun and excitement, not dwelling on the past. Now that he was standing next to Duo he found that his mask resembled something of a god, which was fitting for the self proclaimed god of death.

"You made it!" Quatre said happily as he embraced Duo in a hug.

"And why wouldn't we?" Duo demanded teasingly.

Quatre smiled. It was nice to finally see Duo again outside of war and personal problems.

"So how much coaxing did it take to get Trowa out of the house?" he asked as he moved to stand across from the couple.

"It was his idea actually." Duo said smiling back. "I didn't even know the invites had come in." Duo nudged Trowa in the ribs playfully.

"I thought it would be nice to get out of the house." There was a slight pause that stretched between them. "That and I knew Duo would harass me about it until I said yes. So I beat him to it." A slight smile touched his lips and Quatre started laughing.

"That's Duo for you." Quatre said as Duo objected to Trowa's comment by claiming he would have done no such thing.

"Did Heero respond to the invite?" Duo asked carefully, knowing it was a sensitive subject.

"No." Quatre replied. "I figured he wouldn't anyway, so I'm not going to dwell on it." He managed to force a smile onto his face so that he wouldn't worry his friends. In all honestly, he was a little upset that Heero hadn't responded in anyway to the invitation. At the same time, Heero was probably out of town on some crazed, self appointed mission.

"WuFei RSVP'd though." From the shocked expression on Duo's face, Quatre could tell that he hadn't been expecting that.

"Are you joking?" Duo asked, not wanting to believe that the justice seeking, Chinese man would take time out from his never ending quest to attend a party.

"Nope, Janice called yesterday to say that WuFei would be here."

Duo thought about that for a moment. If WuFei hadn't called in directly, which was odd, then there was more to the story, but he kept that thought to himself. He could pry the information out of him later.

"Speaking of WuFei," Trowa motioned towards the doors.

It was easy to pick WuFei out of the crowd. His black hair that was normally pulled into such a tight ponytail, you'd swear his face would peel back, was down about his shoulders, his mask one of a Chinese dragon of sorts. Quatre did not recognize the woman on his arm, however, and the dove-like mask she wore told him nothing. There was a familiarity about her though, he just couldn't place it.

Her hair hung to about mid-back in layers, the front swept back and pinned in a simple style. The white dress accentuated her tall, slim figure perfectly. Thin straps lead into a low U cut neck line where added fabric seemed to crease over it's self. The dresses frame seemed to hug her body comfortably to a little past her hips before falling loosely to the floor, a small train in the back.

Quatre watched as Duo wave a hand in the air to grab WuFei's attention, giving him a clue to their location.

"I wasn't sure if you'd actually show up, WuFei." Quatre said and he shook WuFei's hand in greeting.

"I can't spend all my time in the office, no matter how much I'd like to." It was a small jest, but it removed any lingering doubts Quatre had about WuFei's presence.

"And who is your companion?" Quatre asked, turning his attention to the woman.

Her face was in a frown and Quatre wondered what had put it there.

"I can't believe you don't recognize me." She said, jokingly. "I can't believe you forgot what I look like so fast."

"Janice?!"

It came from Duo, Quatre was still in shock that he had spent so long with her and hadn't recognized her.

"You cut your hair!" Duo exclaimed, appalled that someone would do such an unspeakable act.

"I got it trimmed, keeps it healthy you know." Janice defended herself while laughing.

While Duo and Janice argued over what should and shouldn't be done with long hair, Quatre turned back to WuFei.

"I'm really glad you came, and willingly too."

WuFei smiled back, forced would have been a better word for it, as he thought back two days ago.

(o)flashback(o)

"WuFei, Quatre sent you an invite to his party." Janice said as she set his down on his desk while she read her own.

Janice was pulling double duty as Heero's secretary and now his. She was efficient though, very quick, and he had begun to rely on her quite heavily for his extra work. Janice was always on top of things and never left files unfinished. Her cheerful attitude in the office dimmed even Heero's sour mood.

They rarely spoke to one another, with her office duties and field work keeping her on the go constantly. A few times he had caught her in the café down the street, pouring over a stack of files on her lunch break. He had helped her then, as much as he could in an hour. That very same evening everything had been finished and waiting on his desk for approval.

Somewhere, in the midst of all the work and chaos that was the Preventers office, he had grown attached to her, more so than just an employee, supervisor relationship. Janice had slipped under his defense without him ever knowing it; he wasn't even sure if she knew that.

"Tell him that I can't attend. I have work to do."

"You know damn well there isn't any 'work' for you to do! I finished it already!"

WuFei looked up from his computer at the angry tone in her voice.

"Would it kill you to get out and do something? Even Lady Une gets out."

"I have stuff to do outside of work." It was a lie, but he hoped she would believe it.

"Don't lie to me, we all know you don't have anything to do." She gave him a hard stare. "The party starts at eight on Saturday, I already called Quatre to confirm your attendance. Don't be late or he'll be upset." She smiled at him as she waked out the door.

WuFei stared after her for a moment, dumbfounded at what had just happened. He had tracked her down demanding an explanation, she had given none. Deciding that if he had to go, then she would have to go also, he offered to pick her up at seven thirty. Janice agreed without hesitation.

(o)(o)(o)

"Sometimes I need to get away from everything." WuFei smiled, not wanting Quatre to know he had, more or less, been forced to come; and when he thought about it, he was really glad Janice had done what she had done. She had wittingly conned him into a date without him ever having to ask.

"I agree." Janice had cut in. "Sorry Quatre, but I'm stealing him away for a moment." She smiled at him over her shoulder as she took hold of WuFei and led him to the floor for a dance.

She seemed so happy to Quatre, and he tried to remember if she had always been that way, or if it was only in the presence of the Chinese pilot. Either way, it didn't matter much; they were both happy in each others company. That thought saddened him a bit, but he pushed it away, now was a time to be and enjoy the company of his friends.

to be continued


	13. Ch 13 Talking to No One

Ch. 13 Talking to No One

continued

Heero's heart leapt into his throat when he saw Quatre standing on the second story balcony. When he had turned away, he gave a sigh of relief, but when Quatre came back and looked directly at him he nearly panicked. Not wanting to be discovered right away, he had disappeared onto the stairs and out of sight. Quatre had seen him, or hinted that he had, but Heero was sure he'd moved fast enough to throw Quatre off.

He reached the top of the stairs just in time to see Quatre lose his footing and start to tip over the balcony edge. Without thinking, he rushed to Quatre's aid, pulling him back, away from the rail and against his chest. He reveled in the scent that was Quatre, lavender vanilla. Feeling him warm and safe against his chest had his thoughts in chaos, but as Quatre regained his senses, Heero quickly came around, released him and disappeared into the shadows and away from detection.

Quatre had been looking for him, as if he really wanted him to be there; that thought gave him hope, but he squashed it before it took too firm a hold. He had damaged their relationship and he had to repair that before he could hope for something more. Making sure his mask was in place and wouldn't give away his identity, Heero moved to the balcony across from the one Quatre had been on, to get a better view of the floor bellow. He kept to the shadows as he moved positions, not wanting the other pilots to see him either. Once situated on the balcony, he was a little shocked to see Janice and Wufei dancing together.

_When did that happen? _He thought to himself. Had he been so wrapped up in his own problems that he had completely missed this? Wufei even seemed to be enjoying her company. Heero couldn't remember the last time he had seen the 05 pilot seemingly at peace with the world. He moved his eyes away from them and back to Quatre who was now sitting at a table, downing a glass of champagne.

Quatre must have been unnerved about something, because he rarely drank and when he did, it certainly wasn't an entire glass at once. There was obviously something weighing heavily on his mind. A pang of guilt crept into his consciousness; he was probably what was dragging Quatre down. What he wouldn't give to put a smile on Quatre's face, or hear his laughter again, things he had not heard in some time.

He couldn't tell how much time had passed as he continued to watch Quatre in his endeavor to drown out his problems in alcohol. Then, the man from the bar the other night approached Quatre and removed the most current glass of champagne from his hand. Jealously rose in his chest causing him to rise out of his chair as the stranger led Quatre to the floor for a dance, holding him close like a lover would. The man dipped his head in low to steal a kiss and whisper something in Quatre's ear, eliciting a soft laugh from the blonde. Watching the scene bellow only infuriated him more, that should be him down there, not some strange guy.

"That guy means nothing to him you know." Came a low female voice. "Quatre thinks he can erase you from his memory if he throws himself into another relationship, but it's you he wants Heero. It's you he cries out for in the night, you he craves, and you he would die for."

The familiar female voice was silent as Heero sat there; digesting all that had been said. When he turned around to confront the woman, there was no one and looking back out over the balcony, he found Janice sitting next to WuFei having a conversation with Trowa.

Standing he checked his mask to make sure it was in place and that he wouldn't be recognized, not that it worried him, with the amount Quatre had been drinking he probably wouldn't remember anything in the morning anyway. Making his way back down stairs he double checked his mask and made sure that his hair was smoothed down , something that was uncharacteristic of him. He picked his way through the crowd of people on the dance floor until he found Quatre, the stranger whispering things in his ear.

Heero walked up behind the unsuspecting man and whispered, "If I see you near him again I will personally see to your death."

The man spun around nervously, but there was no one there. Apologizing profusely to the blonde, he left Quatre stunned and alone in the middle of the floor. Confused, Quatre stood there, his mind a blur from the alcohol he had consumed earlier when someone took hold of his hand from behind. Before he knew what was happening, he was turned around and pulled into another man's embrace before slowly moving around the dance floor.

At first, Quatre didn't think much on what was going on, it wasn't like he was dating anyone, but the longer he danced with this man, the more he realized there was something familiar about him. His hazy mind wouldn't allow him to make sense of it though, making him regret having drunk so much so early on. Staring up at the man he tried to get a glimpse of his face, but his mask hid a majority of his features. Resigning to the fact that he wasn't going to figure who this man was, he allowed the familiar scent from the man to comfort his befuddled mind.

(o)(o)(o)

Heero reveled in Quatre's scent and the warmth of their bodies being in such close proximity. He could feel Quatre's eyes on him but he continued to stare somewhere over the top of his head. The fact that he was actually holding Quatre seemed almost surreal. Suddenly Quatre cuddled up closer to him, resting his head on Heero's shoulder, making his scent even stronger.

"Heero…" came Quatre's voice, low and soft.

Heero stopped dead in his tracks, accidently bumping into another dancing couple.

"Heero, I've missed you so much." Quatre's voice was dreamy.

Heero couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"Heero, you damn jerk!" That statement shocked Heero. "Come home." There was such a pleading tone in his voice that he pulled Quatre as close to him as he could. He could feel the hot dampness of tears soak through his shirt.

"I'm home Quatre, I'm home." Heero whispered, holding back the unfamiliar urge to cry. Looking down he discovered that Quatre had somehow fallen asleep while they were dancing. That thought brought a smile to his face, something he hadn't done in over a year.

"Heero." Quatre whispered again, clinging to Heero with such desperation that Heero felt guilt ridden for ever leaving the blonde.

"Take him home, we can manage things here." came the low female voice from earlier.

Heero didn't bother to turn around, he already knew no one would be there. Picking up his sleeping dance partner he made his way out of the dance hall and to his car. Making his way down the driveway and started towards Quatre's house then decided his apartment would be better. It would add an extra hour to his drive, but if Quatre had drank as much as he thought he had, the small apartment would make things easier on Quatre in the morning.

Arriving at his apartment complex Heero went to open the door to carry Quatre up when the door opened on its own. He watched as Quatre stumbled out of the car to lean against the rear passenger door. He looked confused and disoriented. Heero stood at a respectful distance to let Quatre take in his surroundings.

"Whaz goin on?" Quatre asked, his speech slurred quite a bit from the alcohol.

"Quatre, we're at my apartment. You fell asleep at the party, so I'm taking you home." Heero replied in a low tone.

"I don't wanna go with you!" Quatre yelled. "You damn bastard! You left me and expect me to just take you back!" He leaned forward to get into Heero's face when he got dizzy and lost his balance.

Lucky for Quatre, Heero had been waiting for such a moment and caught him. Quatre stubbornly pushed away when his vision had cleared.

"I don't need your help either!" he yelled leaning against the car again.

"Quatre, I'm not looking to start an argument, I'm just trying to help you get to my apartment." Heero regretted his choice of words the moment they left his mouth and by the look on Quatre's face, he was livid.

"You think because I had a little to drink that you can just sleep with me and make everything alright?"

"Quatre that's not what I meant…

"What did you mean Heero? Did you think that you could just walk back into my life after leaving me when I needed you most? Who do you think I am?" he demanded stepping away from the car once again. Heero saw the look of nausea suddenly dominate his features and managed to step to the side just in time.

He comfortingly rubbed Quatre's back until he finished, then handed him a handkerchief so that he could clean himself up. Once he was finished he shrugged off Heero's touch and moved further down the car.

"I don't want your help Heero, and I don't want you." Quatre said in a low angry tone.

Heero let out a frustrated sigh, tucked his hands into his pocket and leaned up against the car as well. Tipping his head back he looked up towards the sky.

"I know I made a mistake leaving you like I did. It seems to be a trend, when you need me most, I'm never there. I'm not expecting you to take me back, but you could at least let me help you. You've always been there for me and helped me even if I didn't want it, the least I can do is return the favor." Heero continued to stare up the sky as he waited for a response, when none came he looked over at Quatre; he had passed out against the car. Shaking his head Heero closed the car door and picked up Quatre.

When he entered the apartment he decided to leave the lights off for fear of waking up Quatre. After placing him in the bed, he removed every item of clothing except his boxers, leaving less items of clothing to be removed in the morning. When he was sure that Quatre was comfortable in his bed, he pulled a blanket from the hall closet along with a spare pillow; the couch would be his bed tonight, but he was alright with that. At least he knew that for tonight Quatre would be safe.

(o)(o)(o)

He felt sick, but not nearly as bad as he should have been from all the drinking he had done the night before. Rolling over he opened his eyes to see the clock, eleven forty-three. He groaned as he rolled over onto his back covering his eyes in a vain attempt to rid himself of his massive headache. He remembered very little about the night before, which may be a problem depending on what he had done. Looking around the room he tried to remember what had happened last night.

The room was dark, but oddly familiar, and he was sure it had been a while since he had last seen this room. At the moment, he didn't' really care where he was as long as he didn't have to move very far. Pulling the blanket up under his chin, he reveled in the familiar scent, it was so calming, just like had been in the past. Quatre bolted upright into a sitting position and immediately regretted it as he jumped out of bed for the bathroom.

Sitting on the floor of the bathroom, back against the cool wall, he let the remaining nausea pass. Parts of last night began to come back to him in bits and pieces. He remembered being on the dance floor with a coworker then being in some stranger's arms, then he remembered arguing with Heero outside the apartment. Now remembering what he had said was something completely different.

Flushing the toilet and slowly climbing up off the floor, he made his way back into the bedroom to locate his clothes, which he didn't remember taking off in the first place. What he really wanted to do was crawl back into the warm bed and sleep the rest of the day away, but he needed to get out of there before Heero woke up. As a matter of fact, where was Heero? Heero never left him alone in the bed, not after his attack.

Quatre finally managed to get dressed without vomiting on the floor, while it was tempting, he needed to get home. He slowly walked down the short hallway and into the living room to find Heero still asleep on the couch. As he attempted to tiptoe past him, he noticed the mask on the coffee table causing him to stumble over a stool at the counter. That mask, it was Heero he'd been with last night! How could he have been so blind?

Their conversations from the previous night suddenly came flooding back.

(o)(o)(o)

I know, long time no see lol. I've been working hard on coming up with an ending, but I'm not having much luck, so I'll post this to keep every happy while I come up with a decent ending :D


	14. Ch 14 Hopeful

Ch. 14 Hopeful

*warning some OOC in this chapter*

Flashback

"Whaz goin on?" His speech had been horribly slurred with all the liquor he's had early in the night.

"Quatre, we're at my apartment. You fell asleep at the party, so I'm taking you home." Heero had replied his tone low, almost inaudible.

"I don't wanna go with you!" He had yelled. "You damn bastard! You left me and expect me to just take you back!" He remembered leaning forward, but not much after. His next memory was Heero steadying him, but he's pushed him away then.

"I don't need your help either!" he yelled leaning against the car, feeling more secure with something sturdy at his back.

"Quatre, I'm not looking to start an argument, I'm just trying to help you get to my apartment." Heero had responded, then a look akin to horror crossed his face as soon as the words had left his mouth.

"You think because I had a little to drink that you can just sleep with me and make everything alright?" He remembered being so irate he couldn't think straight.

"Quatre that's not what I meant." Heero's stumbling words had barely registered in his mind at the time.

"What did you mean Heero? Did you think that you could just walk back into my life after leaving me when I needed you most? Who do you think I am?" he'd demanded. He shook off Heero's touch when he tried to comfort him.

"I don't want your help Heero, and I don't want you." Heero's words after that came in a blur. He remembered it being something like, "I'm not expecting you to take me back, I made a mistake, when you needed me the most…." He couldn't fully remember the exact wording, but he was sure that whatever Heero had said, had been important and he had probably passed out at that point.

He looked down at Heero, confirming that he was indeed still asleep. Moving past the chair, he moved as quietly as his hung over body would allow him. Taking in a shaky breath, he held it as he reached out for the door knob grasped it quietly. In one quick instant, his hopes of a perfect escape, shattered.

"Leaving?" Came the sleep laden voice from the couch.

Quatre straightened himself as much as possible without making himself dizzy. Confident that nausea wouldn't over take him, he turned to face his ex –boyfriend. Crystaline blue eyes bore into his own, slightly glossy ones. He felt as if Heero could read the thoughts whirling around in head, it scared and intrigued him at the same time.

Heero made no movement to stop him from leaving, yet, he couldn't get his body to move. All he had to do was turn the knob and …

"I won't stop you from leaving, Quatre." Heero's voice seemed sullen.

Heero's words floated about his head for a moment, taking their time to sink in. He wasn't stopping him, so why was he still standing at the door, his hand hesitating just over the door knob? He desperately sought out the answer, screening through every emotion, every thought he had rolling around in his head, until, finally, he had his answer. He didn't want to leave, he wanted Heero to stop him, he wanted Heero to get off the couch, embrace him and make the world right, like he always had in the past, but that wasn't Heero. However, since Heero wasn't going to stop him, he might as well tell him how he felt while he was still under some influence from the previous nights drinking spree.

"I have loved you in every way a person can, Heero. We have been through hell, not once, but twice, and I have been there, regardless of what you deemed as safe. I can't possibly give anything else to you, I have given it all, every last bit of it, and I haven't asked for anything in return." He stopped to collect the rest of his thoughts, to collect his emotions before they got away from, which they were threatening to do at any moment.

"Just once Heero, just once, I would like you to give back. Something! Anything! You could at least show that you want me around; that you actually give a dam!" His voice was rising, he was so angry, so hurt.

Heero sat up on the couch, Quatre couldn't read him, his expression was one of neutraility, but nothing like the stony mask he usually wore. His grip on the door handle tightened, flight instincts kicking in, but, his mind still fought the urge to leave. Heero had made no aggressive moves towards him, yet. He watched, carefully. Heero stood up and headed his way. He tensed when Heero was less than three feet away, everything screaming at him to leave, to turn the knob and go. He couldn't, he needed closure; he needed to hear what Heero had to say now that he had said his piece.

Heero walked up slowly, making sure to keep his relaxed posture so that Quatre wouldn't bolt out the door, and inevidably, out of his life, forever. He watched Quatre's expression become guarded, his stance tense, like the soldier he was, always ready for battle, of any kind. He stopped less than two feet away from him, and was met with a hard questioning stare.

"I love you Quatre." He said simply, his gut twisting in knots, he felt ill. "I'm not good at this," he confessed, "in fact, I don't know how to do any of this, but it's no excuse. The least I could have done, was be there for you." He wanted to look away, to make the hurt in his lover's eyes disappear, but he had caused this, and he had to fix it.

He took a deep breath.

"You have done more for me than you will ever know. You have shown what it is like, to be human. To care about someone, be in love and loved in return. You have shown me kindness and happiness that I didn't deserve, and you did it without hesitation and without regret." He paused, unsure of what to say next, but Quatre's eyes had softened some, and it gave him hope.

Slowly, he took Quatre's face between his hands and straight into the crystalline blue eyes and said "you have shown me that even a soul dead soldier like me, deserves a chance at happiness." He was so overcome with emotion, he almost fell apart right there, but like his training dictated, he showed very little emotion on his face to reflect his inner turmoil.

"I'm sorry Quatre."

Heero said it so quietly that Quatre barely heard it. He stood, rooted to the spot, Heero's cobalt blue eyes boring into his own, and the softness he saw there told him Heero was fighting some inner battle. At the moment, it didn't matter, his partially alcohol laden brain was still trying to process what had happened, what had been said. Never had such words left Heero's mouth, ever, and he was stunned. He couldn't even grasp at a single response to Heero's questioning eyes; but a response was needed.

"I'm sorry Heero." Quatre said softly. He reached up and gently pulled Heero's hands away from his face. Finding the door knob, he silently left the apartment, desperately wanting to forget the shocked, and heartbroken look on Heero's face.

(o)(o)(o)

The very last bit on the end of this was inspired by real life events. While my ending is a work in progress, lol, I figured I didn't want a predictable ending. However, I think I will write my alternate ending anyway so that everyone can see how it was originally going to end. Please R&R. And to my readers, thanks for the support, I know this ending has been like a year in the making lmao. Hope you enjoy it.


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